2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The birth of the symbolic by a spontaneous act of will in the environment of experiencing the chaos of one's inner worldview. The current reality is such that the saturation with images pushes you to an instant embodiment of the dream of consciousness to live in peremptory tranquility in order to reduce your ego to the narrow point of the moment of one flap of a butterfly's wing. The creation of the symbolic from silence is akin to the divine act of creation, when you can create symbols for your embodiment in object reality, in order to finally feel your presence in this pulsating world. But it all boils down to the fact that we are not even trying to withstand entering into silence, into the field of creating the symbolic, but transferring our anxiety from a collision with internal chaos to real objects, endowing them with a fictitious symbolic meaning. We cannot afford to go down one level with our fear, walk the path of anxiety with our eyes closed and independently build our true symbols and endow them with our true meanings.
Once upon a time, we could not learn to keep anxiety, fear and the desired object in one place and at the same time. We knew for sure that they were separated and this fear, from the fact, for example, that my mother had left and might not return, devoured us from the inside, turning our ability for symbolic creation into a desert of loneliness and inevitable death from hunger and cold. And you have to live with it somehow. And we live, every day, both yesterday and tomorrow, swallowing our fear and even not allowing the possibility in our consciousness that we are really capable of creating the images we lack by means of symbolic creation through the binding of scattered fragments of significant objects inside ourselves into structural symbols of our I …
We cannot be silent at the moment of fear and sincerely believe in the magical power of our angry roar that it will help us to embody and materialize the desired object in an instant. We scream affectively with our actions, tearing space apart with our psychotic desire to take possession of that symbolic object with which we associate our survival and enjoyment of life. Eagerly we generate one culture after another, we connect from one revolution to the restoration of the monarchy, we carry out a harmonious combination of the incongruous, we just want to glue this very made symbol out of atoms, but…. We just do not know how to do it here, just like that from alien objects to us and to them. And it often happens that we own the object, but we do not have a symbolic representation of this object, therefore the very possession of it does not bring us any satisfaction.
It feels like it’s true, it’s impossible to just be in this fear and after experiencing it, build a symbol of your soul on your own and then transfer it to objects, and not vice versa. There is no strength to endure, you want everything at once, there is no strength to be alone with your soul chaos and awaken your sleeping creator, start the synthesis of the simplest and most important symbols of your faith in your salvation and your death. But, we are looking for the creator in other places and we take ready-made symbols, which in practice turn out to be reincarnated objects of someone else's substitution of meanings. To live with them and not, we will decide over time, but what to do with this depressing urge to symbolically create the once destroyed forms of our inner life?
Shut up and hear yourself? Waiting out the storm in a cave and not buying an island to rescue? Who knows who knows.
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