Dance

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

I really wanted to dissolve, in the literal sense of the word, to dissolve myself in this blue sea, my body, which was heavy and loose. On the seashore, children were swarming in the sand, seagulls and some other birds were flying, Mashka's feet were buried in the sand, but she had not experienced any pleasure or happiness for a long time. Temporary and fleeting pieces of happiness in life were pieces of all sorts of yummy - pies, chocolates and other obscenities, and they did not fly by fleeting seagulls, but settled on the sides and bottom like sticky fat jellyfish.

For the hundred and twenty-fifth times Masha lost weight and again, a piece of milk chocolate in her mouth, a melodramatic book in her hands, about all love, carrots, tears, snot. "And in my life, what is with love?" - thought Masha, - "nothing, just a fat ass." Various couples walked along the seashore, courting and hugging. There were girls and women with fat priests there, but this didn’t tell Masha about anything, she didn’t want to be fat, it’s disgusting and unworthy of any love, and certainly His love. He … he was more a fictional character than a real one, and rather frightened with his ideality than amused Mashkin's fantasy. She was afraid of him, maybe she was afraid of all men, Masha did not know for sure, but the fact that pictures from the past flashed in her memory is a fact. The father took the money from the mother, pushed her onto the sofa with all his foolishness and yelled that she was a stupid chicken, or the former, the first and the last, told her what she was good for, said that she was stupid and did not live correctly. Fuuu, Mashka sometimes had a nauseating lump right up to her throat from such memories, and she could only seize herself so that she would not feel sick, for this case there was always food in her bag, she always helped out. Even Masha did not believe that it could be good together, it was temporary, then it would definitely be painful and bad.

In her endless reflections, Masha walked along the evening boulevard of this small coastal town, cafes beckoned with their fragrant generosity and comfort, I wanted to plunge into this world and forget. Masha was already thinking what could be eaten and where, when suddenly a man came out of a small crowd of people and asked her for something. Masha did not immediately understand what they wanted from her. These people played a melody, and the man invited her to dance. Of course, Masha could not, she could not at all, he said nothing, he would teach. Masha could not refuse, but she could not think for a long time about whether to embarrass herself or run away, the strong hands of the man confidently led her by the arms into the circle of the dance, and her eyes, like two magnets, attracted Mashka's entire essence and paralyzed like a boa constrictor of a rabbit. A few mechanical steps, a turn, another turn, again steps. Eyes did not let go, a smile appeared. The man was smiling. It became easier for Masha to move, the tension inside her abdomen was cramping, but her arms and legs were no longer as stone as five minutes ago, Masha even heard music reminiscent of flamenco. Time flowed viscously like in the mysterious picture of Dali, I still wanted to escape. These strong hands and eyes did not give a chance, and Mashkino's body treacherously submitted to sharp and smooth movements, steps and turns. Everything, it's time to run! Masha abruptly tore her hands away, grabbed her bag and ran at a run along the stone sidewalk. Only at home on the bed did she begin to come to her senses, the body thawed, but with some new, unknown waves of delight and excitement. On the palms one could feel the touches of the hands of a street dancer, in his eyes his image and smile, and his strength, which was both dangerous and alluring. I didn't feel like eating. … !!!

A month passed, the bustling city, work and all sorts of chores erased this dance from memory, but the idea of losing weight did not leave Masha. “It would be nice for you and me Mashunya, to touch up the figures,” said Mashka’s friend, “let's go to the dances.” Dancing? Pieces of brilliant confetti fell in Mashka's head with pictures of her sea adventure, and her body was covered with the same light wave of delight and excitement. This helped Masha to stay in training, she was far from an easy flight, the body did not obey and you can overcome pain and stress only by remembering pleasure, and during the dance these feelings were mixed in the body and pushed upward, go forward, return to training in order to get more a portion of happiness.

So another happiness appeared in Mashka's life, there was less food, and what about men? She still avoids them, but that's another story.