2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
"What brings you to me?" This is an important question for me as a specialist who wants to help bring the client's request to life.
There are people who perceive psychologists as magicians and sorcerers who can read minds, change reality, and fulfill any desires. They are like Vovka from the cartoon about the far-away kingdom, who wanted to learn the wisdom from Vasilis the Wise. "I want everything to work out by itself and faster!" But it doesn't work that way. No matter how venerable psychologist works with such requests, he will not get off the ground. Because requests are unrealistic. I will give examples of such requests.
- You should know what I want! Show me what I want!
- I want to relax. I don’t want to learn this. And I don't want to see where the tension is growing either.
- Show me on someone how you work.
- Your psychology books are nonsense. Prove to me here and now that it is not.
- My child does not sleep well, is very anxious, afraid of other children. How to make him sleep well, be sociable and stop being afraid of everything?
- How to take revenge on a guy for not loving me, but I love him?
- I have already visited many psychologists in the city … Nobody wants to help … How are you better? Show and tell.
- In one consultation, I want to understand whether I need to change jobs, get a divorce, have a baby, stop feeling stress, or something else as a bonus.
These are one of the few unrealistic requests with which you can change psychologists endlessly. The way out is to work hard and form a real request. One with which you can and should work. Request about yourself.
So what kind of request must be formed to actually be feasible? The answer is simple. One that you can and want to implement. No magic. Everything is honest, open and clear.
The psychologist needs to know why you came. This request should be "for and for" you.
To form a request, you need to focus on yourself. Requests about changing reality, people around - do not work. It is impossible to make another person fall in love with you, it is impossible to remove your anxiety at a click, if you do not understand where this anxiety is born, etc.
Example. Client's request # 1. For the past five years, I have not been able to earn 300,000.00 a year. This year I want to earn this amount.
Client request # 2 For the past five years, I have not been able to earn 300,000.00. What am I doing that I can't earn 300,000.00 a year?
With the first request, you can still walk like this for 10 years. Of course you can get lucky. And the desired 300,000.00 will come. But the second request is more real. The desire to see the obstacles that hinder the fulfillment of a dream is already 50% towards progress towards the goal.
Elena Mayatskaya, psychologist
Recommended:
Correct Request Or How Can I Help You?
Typical complaints at the first consultation: “I don’t understand - how could she do that?”, “I am not married. Somehow it doesn't add up. Help”,“The child is behaving simply unbearably! I already punished him. Tell me, am I right? ","
Process Request And Result Request
I was lucky to work with both children and adults, and I also noticed one regularity. Child's request - for process . A child is not as interested in eating as it is to work with a spoon - for him it is a sensorimotor game. And as a specialist, I will add that one of the most developing (the skill of practical life and self-service;
Trauma Of Violence - Taboo Or Request For Therapy?
“Poverty, curse, darkness, flickering, black swarming slime, father, Satan, darkness, loss, abyss, tank, endless prison, desecration, desecration, indescribable, inexpressible feeling of flickering in my body. Where is the beginning, where is the end, feel nothing, live as if nothing had happened, silently, helplessly.
COMMAND ME ANOTHER! Request For Therapy
"Try to change yourself, and you will understand how negligible your chances are to change others." Voltaire It is clear that they do not go to a psychologist when everything in life suits them and everything is fine. And they apply when a person is at a dead end and does not see an independent way out of the problem, when he is in a difficult situation:
Do Not Enter Without A Request
- Tell me, please, where should I go from here? - Where do you want to go? - answered the Cat. “I don’t care,” said Alice. - Then it doesn't matter where you go, - said the Cat. - just to get somewhere, - Alice explained. - You will definitely get somewhere, - said the Cat.
