HOW PSYCHOTHERAPY AFFECTS DECISION-MAKING

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

How often in our life do we have to make decisions? Almost always. Every day we make a variety of decisions that somehow affect our lives. Yes, these decisions are not always global, they are often quite simple, for example, go or not go to a meeting, read or not read a book, what to cook for lunch. No one knows how even such a simple choice affects our future life.

One involuntarily recalls the work of Ray Bradbury "And Thunder Rocked", where it was described that a time machine was invented and tourist travels in the past became possible. And so one group of tourists went to gaze at the dinosaurs. When disembarking in that period, people were warned that it was forbidden to go off the walking path. But, as always, according to the law of the genre, one tourist stumbled unsuccessfully, crushing a butterfly. So what, in fact, can happen if you crush a butterfly a million years ago? Yes, it seems, nothing special should happen. So he thought so. Actually, nothing happened, except that, when he returned, he saw a purple sky, a new spelling and a couple of "minor" changes.

For me, this is a work about the fact that the smallest decision that we make in our life is the beginning and, at the same time, the continuation of a certain general process called “life”. Any decision made today shapes our tomorrow. Therefore, in fact, we are responsible for what will happen to us tomorrow. After all, when deciding how to think, we shape what we will say. By deciding how to speak, we shape what we do. When deciding what we will do, we form our habits, then our character, and then our life.

So how to figure out what to choose, what decision to make? Who can advise on how to make the right choice? What is the mainstay in our constantly changing world?

For me, this is about the fact that, making a decision in my life, only I am responsible for it. If I transfer the right to someone to make decisions in my life, then I automatically transfer responsibility for the consequences of this decision. Yes, if I fail, then I can shift the responsibility to someone else. I will be able to say that it was not my fault that I suffered a failure. Perhaps for a while I will feel relief and freedom from feelings of guilt, but I will not feel satisfaction for sure. After all, I did not get what I wanted. Subsequently, I will again have to make decisions, and every time, if I use the usual scheme, I will face disappointment, because no one knows what I really need, what I really want. Nobody except me. Therefore, only I can make decisions in my life, because this is my life, and only I can know what I need. And if I don't know yet, then only I have a chance to find out. Nobody has this chance, only me. It is a very difficult but exciting journey of a lifetime.

Therefore, it seems to me that getting to know yourself better is a prerequisite in order to make the right decisions in your life. After all, realizing what I really need, what needs I want to satisfy, what I want to receive, I have a chance, when making a decision, to be guided by certain information that I have learned about myself. Where can I get this information? Only at home. The whole process of psychotherapy is aimed at enabling the client to get to know himself, with his real self. After all, we all know very well that the conclusions about how to act are based on the information that we own. What if the information is inaccurate or incorrect? What will be the actions? Incorrect and inaccurate. Therefore, acquaintance with oneself seems to me the first necessity in the context of making the right decisions, which will be based on understanding oneself, realizing one's needs, feeling one's desires.