How To Find Your Calling In Life

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Some people seek the help of a psychologist to find the vocation or job of their dreams, take a step into a new life and, finally, monetize their hobby. Or, with the help of various information, trainings and tests, determine your purpose, mission, life task. At the same time, many associate themselves as a person with a type of activity: “I can’t find myself, no matter what I try, I can’t find a dream job.” In search of himself, a person sorts out companies and business areas, but cannot stop at anything. Why? Because "dream job", "vocation" is a myth. It just doesn't exist. A person expects from each new place something unimaginable: emotions, pleasure, joy. But aspirations are not justified, and then he again embarks on a search. Why is this happening, after all, how to find what you love? Let's look at the situation from the objective point of view of a professional psychologist. I, Maria Kudryavtseva, a psychologist with vast experience in practical work on the harmonious development of personality, can professionally help you. Read this article to the end and find out if you can even find your calling.

Can work be a calling

Even at a good job, you still have to do something through force: come to the office when you don't want to, discuss business issues with colleagues, when you want to relax or talk with your family. Quite often, a person is forced to overstep his needs, to continue to work through “I can’t”. Just because work itself cannot be a vocation, it was created not to love it, but to do it efficiently and professionally.

• Enjoy the process - yes!
• Enjoy the results - yes!
• To experience a state of security and comfort, receiving a decent salary and social guarantees - yes!

But all these feelings and sensations are not love, and work is not a vocation. Love your family, friends, pets, flowers - whatever is alive. And you don't have to love work!

From a hobby to a profession of life

There are many common phrases about what you need to make a hobby your profession, then you won't have to work a day. Everything will fall into place. Satisfaction, joy will come, and even money will be paid for it. No. Everyday practice shows that as soon as a hobby becomes a job, it acquires all those features that tired you, annoyed or did not suit you in the office routine.

Just imagine the situation. At your leisure, in your free time, without straining, you sew a teddy bear, bunny or cat for a child. It's a hobby. A great pastime: you relax, get distracted from worries, get charged with positive emotions from the joy of a baby who has received a new toy.

But you have made your hobby a job, a profession of life. And the bears need to be sewn 10 pieces per week in order to distribute to customers on time. Otherwise, it makes no sense: work will not bring income. Will you enjoy being in a hurry, meeting deadlines, striving to do everything quickly but efficiently? Hardly. And what you liked so much before will quickly get bored and tired. Enthusiasm will fizzle out.

Vocation. Fantasy and reality

Fantasies about one's vocation and the choice of work are determined not so much by the craving for any kind of activity, but rather by the inclination, the specifics of the personality. How many people in their youth dreamed and fantasized about their future, wanted to be singers, artists, actors? And what percentage of dreamers have embodied these desires into reality? Dreams and abilities are different things. You can fantasize about the career of a TV star, but at the same time really be able to work perfectly with numbers and become a highly paid accountant, analyst, economist. This is normal, of course, natural.

"Well, I don't like my job!" - again you will object. Then look for hidden meaning in your professional pursuits. You don't just hold on to the seat. You are satisfied with the salary or the closeness of the office to home, a good team or a trusting relationship with your superiors - all this fills the work with meaning, reconciles you with it. This is reality. It is not necessary to enjoy the process of work, it is enough to experience positive emotions from individual components.

What will remain after me, what a trace in life

The idea of a mission and purpose sounds beautiful, but unrealistic. We're just a species of homo sapiens. And our destiny is to reproduce, no matter how vulgar it may seem. For this we work, improve our living conditions, invest in children and grandchildren. On the way we suffer and rejoice, love and hate, create and destroy. And on this path, everyone has the opportunity to choose what mark he will leave in the lives of other people and society as a whole. There is no one (God, the Universe, Karma) who would sit and think, choose, prescribe a purpose for you. But you yourself can create the meaning of life, make your work meaningful and constructive.

A vocation in life is a path to personal harmonization

There is usually some experience behind what we love to do. In infancy, it was impossible to walk, but repeating the same action led to mastering the skill and we began to like not only walking, but running or dancing. So in any activity, we are able to learn how to do it in such a way as to get pleasure not only from the result, but also from the process. This fits well with the concept of "vocation in life."

And this is not just my opinion. I found confirmation in a wonderful book by Jeff Colvin. He talks about how he set up a lifelong experiment and made his three daughters grandmasters. The subtitle of the book "Talent Has Nothing to Do with It" says a lot. Talent can be replaced by hard work. And those who work usually achieve more than talents who are aware of their capabilities, do not consider it necessary to make extra efforts and achieve nothing in the end.

So, you learn, get experience, become a pro in some business. Even if the soul did not initially lie to him, then with the first results, satisfaction with his actions usually comes. Hone your skills, spend over 10,000 hours of study and practical mastering of the profession to become a real expert. This path will be more effective and correct than the endless search for your place under the sun by trial and error. "Your business" is what you really know how.

The path to success, efficiency, professional results begins with the harmonization of the personality. And not from horoscopes or fortune-telling, as some think. Numerous books or trainings with titles like "The Secret of Success", "How to Become Rich", "How to Fly Up the Career Ladder" will not work. Your efficiency is your day to day work. There is no need for fruitless tossing, doubts, hesitations. Pick your niche socially and professionally and pave the way for success.