2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Zoya was sitting on the sofa and listening to her son. He sat down in a chair and told how he was doing. She was glad that he came to visit them. Usually, he and his daughter-in-law came once a month, and then there was such a pleasant surprise.
The warmth of the meeting ended at the moment when Igor said that his father expresses his apologies for his insistence on selling the apartment. Zoya understood why her son ended up in the parental home. She and her husband had a fight the other day.
The scandal erupted due to the fact that Peter wants to buy a house in the village. And for this you need to sell the apartment. To which she disagrees. She wants to stay in the city, closer to her grandson and friends. What will she do in the village? To breed bees as the husband wants. No really!
Zoya got angry when she realized that her husband had sent her son. He again draws Igor into their marital affairs. She scared her husband with divorce when his pressure crossed the boundaries. So, she defended herself. The husband gave up positions and left. But instead of himself, he sent a son.
- Son, I'll tell you what - don't get involved in our affairs. We'll figure it out ourselves. I feel guilty before you that I did not put you outside the fence of my relationship with my husband, when he first sent you to apologize. You looked funny helping us make up. Saved our marriage. Enough for now. It won't be your fault what happens next. If I divorce your father, I will remain your mother, and with him my marital relationship will end. - Zoya sighed and looked out the window, - I do not want to talk more on this topic. This is my business with him. And you have your own family, and there you can solve issues.
* * *
Igor was at work when his father called him and said that he had a quarrel with his mother. And that she was threatening divorce if he didn't stop pushing for a stupid move to the countryside. The father asked him to talk to his mother and apologized for his persistence.
Igor agreed without hesitation. He did this since childhood, when his parents quarreled. Throwing his affairs, he rushed to help them, feeling like a superman who helps his beloved dad and mom.
But he had anxiety - what if he could not cope? The mission will fail and then he will be to blame for their divorce and will be left without parents. He was afraid and was ready to beg his mother to forgive his father.
But this time, before he could get down to business, his mother stopped him. Igor was confused. What will he do now? He is used to taking part in their lives. He was angry with his mother, feeling exiled and deceived. How will he look his father in the eyes, who is waiting for a truce? Fear and guilt consumed Igor. Today he has failed - the father will have to put up with his wife himself.
Igor sat and thought about his mother's words, and then said:
- Yes, mom, you are right, you should have sent me outside the door of your relationship long ago. Now I can go about my business. Do not run away from work, do not leave your family, for the sake of your reconciliation. I'm glad you don't need me anymore. Thank you.
He got up and hugged Mom.
* * *
Peter returned home in the hope that his son had settled everything. Igor has always coped with this task. He used it for this purpose from the age of five. Zoya melted when her son came to her and plaintively asked her to forgive her dad.
Once Peter hit Zoya. Then he was afraid to come up and ask for forgiveness from his wife. He was afraid that he would not have enough words to express his regret, and she would reject him. Only a son could win her favor for him. Then they used Igor for the first time as an intermediary. Since then, this has continued to the present day.
He opened the door and entered the apartment. The wife and son stood in the hallway. Igor was getting dressed. After greeting his father, he said:
- Dad, I'm sorry, it didn't work out today. And I ask you - do not drag me into your relationship anymore. I love you and you are my parents. But what do you do with your married life, decide without me.
Igor looked at his father. Feeling guilty, he looked away and left the apartment.
- Come on, Peter, we have something to discuss, - said Zoya, closing the door behind her son, - now we are left alone. It's time for us to grow up, and on our own to solve our marital issues.
From SW. gestalt therapist Dmitry Lenngren
