Life Imprisonment Or "the Correct View Of A Woman"

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

What does it mean to be a girl in our country? Although no, not like that. What does it mean to be a woman in the post of Soviet territory? I don’t know about you, it’s not the most pleasant picture for me when I think about it. In our society, the world is woven from contradictions, substitution of concepts, not real values and choice without choice. And the saddest thing is that it has a very strong effect on women.

What does it mean to be a woman? How does it feel to be a girl? These questions are very complex in their essence, but they are further complicated by society each time throwing more and more firewood on the fire, on which for any deviation from the "generally accepted" a woman is ready to burn as a heretic. Where does it all start? … From the very beginning…

You are still a small, active girl. You like to run, play ball, dolls, cars, collect puzzles and tinker. You like climbing trees, hoarding in the sand and reading books. But the older you get, the more often you hear: “don't go there, you're a girl”, “put on a dress, you're a girl”, “be careful, don't break your knees, you're a girl”, “don't get dirty, you're a girl” … List grows and grows from all sorts of no and no, because “you’re a girl” and you don’t freely begin to think that all research, discoveries and comfort are clearly not for you because you are a girl. And it's all the same that you can study this world only by touching it. “You are a girl! You must decorate the world, not study or change it! - that's what is ringing in the ears.

You are growing and “you’re a girl” is gaining momentum. There is no new "should" in the list and cannot be added. It turns out that you should strive to be fashionable, think about how to please the boys (mainly outwardly), dream of a prince, a wedding and remember that "you have to give birth." Do not take care of the figure as it speaks of a small mind. And take care of the figure as otherwise "you're scary." And the most important thing to remember is that the most important thing for a woman is to marry successfully. Although God bless him, at least get married. And after reading stacks of smart books and putting on your favorite comfortable jeans, you sit and think that “it’s like the 21st century, and the attitude towards the female sex is as if it’s 16-17.” And God bless you only to think, not to speak. After all, one has only to voice his assumption that happiness can lie in something other than the presence of a man (for example, in your favorite business), you will be immediately reminded that “you’re a girl,” and they will say that you do not understand anything.

And the further, the more fun. With each new round of your development, new "women must and must" appear. Should be beautiful, sexy, smart (but not strong), stupid (but not very), with ambition, but no more than the men around you (otherwise they will think that you are a bitch). Learn to attract, lure, re-read articles on the topic "what a man likes in sex", to be experienced in bed, but with a minimum number of partners (and at least we will notice each one requiring his own). Be a mistress in the kitchen, a lover in bed, a muse, an inspiration, a partner, a nanny. Completely accept your man, without trying to change him, and be ready to change for him at the same time. Do not strive to have children and get married now, but ready to want to at the command (since your partner still wants to take a walk). Be light in relationships, frivolous and serious. Reckless and planning. But the main thing … the main thing is that you must remember that "you are a girl." And girls are always ready to give in, give up their desires and needs for the sake of their beloved man and in the future also children, because this is their essence. No, not even the point. This is their mission.

Girl, this is some kind of mythical creature that descended from the pages of a book of fairy tales. She should dress beautifully and fashionably, but at the same time her salary is often less than that of men, and the prices for her wardrobe are more than for his wardrobe. Taking her to work is one continuous risk: if not married, she will soon get out, if married, she will soon give birth, if she gave birth, a decree, if the child is 3 years old, she will be on sick leave, and if not sick, she will soon give birth to a second / third / fifth. If she loves children, she is a potential maternity worker; if she doesn’t love children, she is a child-hater and a monster. She got married early (before 22) - frivolous or out of the blue, not married (but about 30 herself) - a terrible / bitch / careerist / man-hater … Do not strive for a career - stupid, builds a career - a bitch (againJ). A woman secretary is frivolous and stupid, easily accessible, A woman is a leader - a fight is a woman and not a woman, but a man in a skirt. And this is how we live … And this is not to mention the fact that some of the professions are still considered exclusively male (for example, the military) and stereotypes are still applied to women in this area. And a number of men generally believe that a woman's task is to cook borscht and nurse children.

Speaking of children … This is generally a separate duty. If you are female, then you must love children and want to become a mother. Otherwise, you are abnormal and sick. You should enjoy spending time with other people's children, playing with them and babysitting. And from the moment you find out that you are pregnant, you must give up your desires, needs and plans and devote all of yourself to the future baby. From this moment on, you are not important, you are just a capsule, a shell for carrying a new life. Only the child is important. And the level of your devotion to the baby is measured in the sacrifices you made and the level of happiness from it. And if you, God forbid, did not plan, are not ready or do not want to sacrifice, you are a bad mother.

From the fact that you are pregnant, you are already getting stupid. And the level of stupidity and dependence growing in you is growing in direct proportion to your belly. Nobody cares how difficult tasks you are able to solve at 8 or 9 months of pregnancy. You're stupid. It is a fact. Since they get duller from pregnancy and everyone knows it. Therefore, when choosing a stroller in a store, you are not asked what kind of stroller you want. You will be asked more about the color (pink or blue) and the presence of rhinestones. And they will take you seriously only if there is a husband nearby or a large list of criteria. Are you pregnant and working? Are you out of your mind !? You should only focus on the child! Mickey from pictures of newborns and from miniature things.

A separate topic for "should" breastfeeding with childbirth. Did you give birth yourself and about 20 hours? You are hero! A real mother and woman! She gave birth faster - you are lucky, and you cannot understand what it is like to be a real mother. Caesarean? You are not a real woman! You didn't give birth yourself. Breastfeeding up to 6 months - stepmother; up to a year - the mother is a heroine; up to 2-3 years old - fanatic / abnormal / inadequate. You feed with a mixture - a child-killer / sadist. And this is not a complete list of name options.

The decree is a separate topic altogether. If you went on maternity leave and have been sitting there for 3 years, you are a "kluzha mom". You are already lost to society, stupefied, tired and you know nothing about the world except information about diapers, poop, regurgitation and "where did you get your nose." If you were on maternity leave until 1 year, you are a “mother cuckoo”. She abandoned the poor kid in the name of her selfishness. What a mother you are after that. And if you went to work from 3 months - you are not a mother at all! Why gave birth to a poor child? To jail you and to deprive you of parental rights. It doesn't matter why you want or need to return to work. It doesn't matter under what conditions and with what schedule. Your desire and your needs are not important. There will always be someone who will tell you “you’re a mother!”. The one who declares that all this is nonsense and when you get pregnant or give birth you will change your mind. What is right to be … (and what description). And the main thing is that children are the greatest happiness and your mission is to put your whole life on the altar of this happiness, because you are a woman. And you cannot, you have no right to think otherwise.

What's next…. ? So, choose who you want to be: a dumb cuckoo or a selfish cuckoo? But be sure that both are heavy burdens. Which is better: a bitter self-esteem or a huge sense of guilt? How much will you bill your child for sleepless nights and lost opportunities? Or maybe you will drive yourself like a horse to keep everything under control and be an ideal mother (albeit not a happy woman)?

And every time the "must" echoes. And there is not so much choice: to accept the terms of the game or to resist. And how will it be true? Do not know. I only know that this and that the dead end and the loss. Choice without choice. A game in which you will always lose if … you accept its terms. This is no longer the case in many countries. Landmarks are changing in many European countries. And with us, as before, it doesn't matter what your views, needs or desires are. Nor does it interest you that you are just a person and a person. What answer do not pick up people will find something to reproach you with. And it is sad not so much from the fact that among the reproaching crowd there are men, but rather that among them there are women themselves. Those who also went through this path called "you are a girl." Also sacrificing himself. Also tormented by stereotypes. They still stand on a level with the men whom one of them raised and now demand your sacrifice. So that after passing all these circles, you, too, once became one of them. Or at least silently watched, broken and quiet.

It's sad to be wrong. It's sad to try to convey that you are a person and that it could be different. And so I want to believe that one day gender roles will cease to be so aggressively imposed and we will have the opportunity to be individuals. Free from "shoulds" and open to the world and to ourselves. And maybe then we will cease to be debtors and pay off with each new generation. And, most importantly, we will begin to live not on debt, but freely. No stereotypes and labels. Maybe then we will finally turn into happy and free adults, giving birth and raising personalities in their children, replacing the “life sentence of motherhood” with joy. And, having ceased to strive to be goddesses, we will find the strength to become ourselves.