2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Today I want to talk about such a moment of anxiety as helplessness.
How are they related? That's how.
Anxiety, unlike fear, is characterized by vagueness and uncertainty, which makes it difficult to assess the situation and make decisions.
Because of this, anxiety, as opposed to fear, is accompanied by a feeling of helplessness in the face of impending danger.
Helplessness can be caused by external factors (earthquakes, war, hurricane) or internal (weakness, cowardice, lack of initiative).
Therefore, the same situation can cause either anxiety or fear. It depends on how much the person is able or willing to deal with the danger.
For example: a woman at night heard a sound in the next room, it seemed to her that the robbers were trying to break the door. She reacted to this with palpitations and perspiration, anxiety. She went to the eldest daughter's room. The daughter also heard the robbers, but she decided to meet the danger and went to the room where the intruders were operating. As a result, she managed to frighten off the robbers. The mother felt helpless at the thought of danger, but the daughter did not. Anxiety prevailed in the mother, fear in the daughter.
There is a lot of helplessness in anxiety, because the danger is not completely clear. It is vague. To cope with anxiety, as well as with helplessness, it is necessary to face the danger in order to clarify it; see what the danger is, what can I do with it. How big it is, whether I can handle it myself or will I need help. What help is needed, where can I get it, etc.
Therefore, if we feel anxiety in life, it must be clarified.
To do this, you need to answer three questions:
- What is at risk?
- What is the source of the threat?
- What explains my helplessness?
Consider the previous example: what was the threat to the mother? Unclear. Life, property. Only the mother could answer this question, which scared her more.
What is the source of the threat? For the mother, he is not completely clear, she just heard a sound in the next room, which frightened her.
What explains the mother's helplessness? The fact that without understanding what is the source of the threat, it is impossible to assess the situation and cope with it.
The same thing happens in our life. Until we analyze our anxiety and understand what is in danger, who or what is threatening, we cannot make decisions and act. We remain helpless, paralyzed, and anxious.
There is one more thing. An objective danger is described here (robbers are a real objective danger). But in life there are often situations where there is no objective danger. There is a subjective danger, i.e. danger due to subjective internal factors of a person (for example, cowardice, shame, weakness). In such a situation, one can speak of neurotic anxiety. And we will talk about this in the next article.
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