2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Pain always comes at an uninvited hour
It is so long that it seems involuntarily:
Not us - she tests us
In order not to want to hurt
Alas, but the price of life and love
It is possible to learn only in this school:
Where people become people again
After taking a lesson in unbearable pain
(E. Akhadov)
In this post, I want to touch on the topic of experiencing pain. It will be about mental pain. Although pain is pain. And when it happens, then we also experience it, and it tests us on how we are able to cope with it.
I will talk about myself. About how it was with me and what helped me. Perhaps someone will respond and it will become clearer how it is with you.
If conventionally divided into ways of experiencing, then I would call: "masculine" and "feminine." This is a metaphor. And this does not apply to gender differences. This is how both men and women can react to pain.
I used the "masculine" way quite often in my life. For me, it is about "clenching your teeth and enduring." Wait for it to be over. It is very energy consuming. The energy is spent on restraining your feelings - blocking the pain. Don't let her get out of control. And the bonus was the proof of concept: "I am strong." And "galloping horse" and "burning hut".
The downside is destruction. The prohibition on experiencing is the destruction of the whole.
Recently I have learned to experience pain like a woman. In a nutshell, it sounds like this: "To yourself - tenderly." Gently, that is.
I myself become a caring, even caring parent. My own mother.
How does a caring mother feel about the child she loves and has pain?
My answer: she feels sorry for him.
In what way is it actually expressed for me:
First and foremost, I allow myself to be in pain. This is some kind of understanding and acceptance of oneself in this state: "You can be hurt because you are alive."
The second is what I said above - a respectful attitude.
If differentiated by spheres, then it looks like this.
SPHERE BODY: allow yourself to relax a little more, or tasty or something that pleases: a walk, massage, bath.
SPHERE CONTACTS: I allow myself not to communicate with people unpleasant to me. Relationships are universal and can be helpful in any area of life. For example, I can ask a loved one to listen to me, hug, stroke (body sphere). I can ask a loved one about joint activities: “Let's play (checkers, chess, boats, words, etc.), take a walk, watch a film” (sphere of business and sphere of meaning).
SPHERE OF MEANING: good book, film, music, contemplation of nature, prayer, meditation. Being in the moment: feeling life through seeing, hearing, feeling.
Pain is something that can happen to anyone
Pain, as a symptom, signals that something has gone wrong in life. And in this way he draws attention to this very life. Agree that normally it shouldn't hurt. Not in body or soul.
Take care of yourself and stay healthy ♥
Recommended:
What Your Pain Smells Like Or Two Wonderful Ways To Get Rid Of Pain In 5 Minutes
Sometimes inexplicable miracles happen in psychological practice. I bring to your attention one of the psychological miracles. Professor Nikolai Dmitrivich Linde in his practical work developed the method of an imaginary smell in the 90s of the last century.
5 Stages Of Experiencing Loss
I slightly change the text of the note, because a sincere desire to share feelings and thoughts about the sad incident that happened yesterday in society was perceived by some as a desire for PR and advertising on someone else's grief. If someone else heard my text in this way, I'm sorry, and, in order to avoid repetition, I delete the part that raised questions, and leave the words of condolences in my heart.
The Process Of Experiencing Loss
A person in his life constantly loses something - things, time, opportunities, relationships, people. Probably, there is not a single day when something is lost. Perhaps not a single hour or even a minute. Loss is the norm of a person's life and, accordingly, there must be some "
Gestalt Therapy For Women Experiencing Divorce Or Breakup
It happened in my life that almost at the same time I began to engage in gestalt therapy, divorce my husband and part with my loved one. At the same time, I had my first clients. These were women going through a divorce, about to get divorced, or experiencing unrequited love.
Experiencing ONLINE: Self-Help Technique
In 2020, a part of the earthlings who designate themselves as "progressive humanity" experienced an "apocalypse" called "Isolation". Isolation got along with a stocked fridge, sofa, and internet. However, the transition to online ("
