5 Ways To Understand What You Want To Do In Life

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

1. You cannot give up what you really want

2. Determine what you can do effortlessly - others see it, but you don’t

3. Who do you envy?

4. A journey to childhood

5. If you had all the money in the world, what would you do? Would you lie on the couch? I do not think so…

Our world idolizes effort

We live in a society where the working person is equal to the hero. We are being programmed by the media and our acquaintances: here is guy N. practicing, sweating, pushing, getting out of his comfort zone every day - and now he became a millionaire. Here is the girl N. did not give up, tried, promoted despite the lack of faith in herself - and now she is a popular singer, flickering on all famous channels.

Perceiving the above ideas, we ignore the main thing: when a person independently achieves success in any area of life, the occupation to which he is given is not exhausting and exhausting for him. Often, what he has chosen as a profession is fun for him to do! The deadly effort of the master, praised in unison in interviews and magazines, for this person is rather an interesting play element that leads to a new level.

Analyzing how to convert joy into a profession, we are missing the main thing: we devalue the activities that we are good at, for the reason that they are given to us … too easy. In a society where “you cannot easily catch fish from a pond”, it is incredibly difficult to accept such an alignment.

How can you determine what activity brings you joy?

1. You can't get out of what you really want

No matter how hard you try and justify yourself, your desire always flows like a red thread throughout your life. Some goals are considered socially unacceptable: it is ugly to claim that you want fame, or money, or a rich husband, or a beautiful wife. Due to the fact that today it is customary to classify goals into “worthy” and “unworthy”, modern man is in conflict: he clearly feels and subconsciously feels his goal, but if it falls under the category of “unworthy” or “vicious”, we tend to deny the existence of this purpose. We deny our purpose because during our upbringing we were taught that it is important to be a “good girl” or “a good boy”. And good girls and good boys may want certain things. Neither that, nor that. And if your desire does not fall on this list, and you cannot not want it, the conflict escalates and becomes inevitable. Only by recognizing his true goal can a person enter a state of harmony, creativity and the subsequent realization of this goal.

2. What can you do so easily that it seems to you that everyone knows how to do it?

Perfect spelling, poetic thinking, the ability to solve equations, the ability to navigate the terrain - all these amazing qualities can seem to you to be trifling and, therefore, useless. However, have you ever met a person who could not, no matter how hard he tried, to do things that seemed completely natural to you?

Have you forgotten that your interpretation of reality is subjective? Not a single person can claim an absolutely accurate perception of reality without having the opportunity to look at the world through the eyes of every creature that has ever lived on our planet. Therefore, what seems organic and natural to you may look like an unprecedented trick for another person!

Make a list of the qualities and skills that other people, up to this very moment, have admired in you. Disable all filters! Be honest and don't be afraid to exaggerate your merits.

Another variation on this exercise, suggested by the American psychologist Teal Swan, is as follows: Imagine that you are being watched by an alien. This alien is not familiar with the realities of our planet. He does not know how other people behave. He does not know what is considered prestigious on Earth and what is stupid. What are your positive qualities, strengths and achievements would an alien highlight? What would be the first to notice? Write down all the options on behalf of this observing alien.

It's curious that you always know where your strength lies. Why are you avoiding her?

3. People you envy

Often people whom we envy have a number of qualities that we project outward, being unable to see and accept them in ourselves.

Determine the person you are most jealous of. Take a moment to be alone with yourself: you need the utmost honesty! What is this person doing? What is he? Why do they love him? Let me support you: all the good things that you so stubbornly do not want to see either in yourself or in others (at the same time, in all honesty, you envy, as you see it, the happy owner of these laurels), is actually in you. All this is waiting for your attention and conscious development!

4. What did you enjoy doing as a child?

The important thing to understand here is that there are no good or bad things to do for a child. There are activities that the parents encouraged, and there are activities that the parents scolded for. Only you know what gave you joy. What could you do for hours when you were alone with yourself?

A child under the age of 8 is not familiar with intellectual rationalization. He loves some games and dislikes others. What games did you like? What was like a game to you?

5. If you had all the money in the world, what would you do?

Someone will say: "I would be lying on the couch." Of course, you would do that - because all these years you have been raping yourself, giving yourself up to your unloved work, forcing the payment of your apartment bills and pleasing people who are really unpleasant to you!

After spending a few days (or a couple of weeks) on the couch, it's not hard to imagine that you would become unbearably bored! What would you do next? Perhaps you would start to travel? Be specific and look deeper. If you want to travel, what is the basis of your desire to see the world? Maybe you want to feed on worldviews different from your own? Maybe this is your next step leading to development? What other actions can you take to recognize the difference in worldview?

Life is a continuous beadwork. With our daily activities, we continue to string new beads on the fishing line, creating a unique, inimitable bauble. We can string unconsciously - and as a result, most likely, the hell will turn out. And we can choose to draw a certain, favorite pattern - and what? Here it begins to take shape! The choice is yours!

Lilia Cardenas, integral psychologist, psychotherapist