2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
It is natural for each person to experience some kind of anxiety in various significant situations so that he can make an effort to achieve a result. After all, anxiety is based on the instinct of self-preservation, which manifests itself in the form of the body's reaction “run or fight”.
But sometimes, experiencing internal stress, a person begins to feverishly look for signs of danger where there are none, in anticipation of the most unfavorable events in the future. Most often, this happens when anxiety is inherited from parents, forming a dangerous mindset in him. ("Do not go near strangers, otherwise you will be stolen", "Do not go without a hat - otherwise you will get sick and die", etc.)
And then, distorted by such thinking, anxiety resembles Vasily's horse, who, when he has nothing to fear, performs an act of defecation in the middle of the arena and begins to be afraid of his own waste.
This is perfectly shown in the old Soviet film "The Blonde Around the Corner", when Nadenka sobbed at night from the fictitious death of her still non-existent child, planning his fate in great detail. Sobbed so bitterly as if it had already happened.
Or in the client's prophecy that her child will be imprisoned and the position of godfather "with his character!" The child, by the way, was only 5 years old at the time of "mourning"!
People with neurotic anxious thinking can wind up the situation instantly to incredible proportions, because they are bad at filtering incoming information and they perceive every news as a command to be afraid.
Don't pick up the phone - be afraid that you got hit by a car! The child brought a deuce - be afraid that you will become a homeless person! The girl sat down on her knees to Santa Claus and patted his beard - be afraid that the slut is growing!
And now the heartbeat is accelerating, there is noise in the ears, hands become wet, breathing is intermittent, the state is semi-faint, and you begin to rush around the apartment like an animal in a cage, swallowing valerian.
You can help yourself in this case by doing the following:
1. Realize your body, what exactly is happening to it and explain to yourself, as a small child, that this is anxiety. Recognize and accept it.
2. To take a few deep breaths and maximally relaxed exhalation with holding the breath - this will help to restore breathing and return to the state of "here and now".
3. Try to "catch" yourself at the very beginning of anxious thoughts, before they have time to spin into the funnel of a destructive tornado, asking yourself questions:
- What am I thinking now?
- Why am I thinking about it? etc.
4. Separate reality (facts) from frightening fantasies. Test your thoughts for "reality" with the following questions:
- Specifically now, is something threatening my life?
- Why am I sure that my forecast will come true? How do I know what will happen the way I think?
- How often do my predictions come true? Was it such that they did not come true?
- What facts can I rely on to decide whether my prediction will come true or not?
- Could there be another explanation for what is happening?
- How can another person explain this situation?
5. Give yourself a task for one negative thought to find at least two positive ones.
6. Find secondary benefits of anxiety (what will be bad or what will not be good if it disappears).
7. Tell your friend, beloved, psychotherapist about your anxiety - a person who accepts, does not collapse from terrible thoughts and remains stable and calm.
After all, in contact with another, experiencing your anxiety is no longer so scary.
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