2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
We often strive to be understood. We get upset when we try to explain something to a person, but he still does not understand. He doesn't understand how we feel. Doesn't understand why our reactions and actions are exactly the same; in his opinion, they may be different. In many situations we run into a certain degree of misunderstanding.
They do not understand us, and we do not understand either. We also work hard to understand our beloved ones, friends, parents, relatives, but in the end, questions still remain. If something in our head does not fit in with the actions of other people, and they try very hard to explain them to us, we do not understand. If, after explaining, we continue to criticize the action, resent, discuss, - this indicates that we do not understand.
Full understanding is the absence of questions, criticism, indignation. The topic is exhausted when we really understand. We simply state the fact of an act, action or reaction.
We may not understand others at all. We do not understand what drives them and what their motives are. We do not understand only because each of us has our own life and our own reactions to everything that happens in it. We can guess about how it is with another person, since something may be similar. Similar but not identical.
A person does not understand, not because he does not want to, he does not know how it is! It's different for him. All he can do is try to understand. However, if in his life this is completely different from yours, he will not understand you.
There are many different situations, reactions, actions in our lives. In some ways, our situations, reactions, actions are similar to others. And on this similarity, we select like-minded people. But in one the similarity, and in the other - divergence. And this divergence is so common that it is as if you are communicating with a stranger. And here we begin to explain many times what we feel, why we feel this way and what drives us. And often at the same time we demand (I’m not afraid to say this word) understanding from the person. And when he cannot understand, we are very indignant, complain and express indignation. At the same time, it can upset us so much that it is difficult to cope with our own feelings and emotions.
WHAT TO DO? - ACCEPT!!!!
It is important to learn to accept. Just accept a person with all his situations and misunderstandings. How do we accept an elephant with its trunk and big ears))) Accept and understand are two different things. I do not understand, but I accept in a person such an act, such an action, I accept such his motives. They are not clear to me, but by accepting them, I give the right to a person to be what he is. And I give myself the right to be who I am, and I accept the MISCENSE of others of some of my actions, actions and reactions. When I accept, I do not criticize, I do not discuss, I do not condemn. If I accept, I perceive the situation as blue sky or green grass. It’s just like that and nothing else.
In acceptance, I do not just allow the person to be who they are, I also free myself from resentment, disappointment, unjustified expectations, ridiculous feelings that they do not understand me or I do not understand.
Accepting each other for who we are, we make life easier for ourselves and for people dear to us.
And, I think that it is precisely in acceptance that understanding can be born.
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