2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Sitting on the sofa in the living room, Stanislav listened to another portion of the rules of conduct with his parents and at the institute. These "lectures", as he called, were generated by the fact that the father was too heavy on alcohol, and the mother was late at work. He was beginning to worry that they would divorce.
At such moments, the parents took turns complaining to Stanislav about each other. The father said that his mother does not allow him to relax, and he can no longer do this. And the mother - that she was tired of living with her alcoholic husband and was thinking of leaving him. They seemed to be asking for help.
Then Stanislav left his affairs inherent in an eighteen-year-old young man and began to behave in a boorish manner: he was insolent to his mother, rude to teachers, and they complained about his behavior. Stole alcohol from my father while he slept. He stole money from both parents, came home late.
Then the mother begged his father to stop drinking and start raising his son. And it worked - the father left the alcohol and together with the mother they returned the son to his place. Parents reunited - Stanislav's anxiety disappeared. All that remained was to listen to the lectures, and for a while there was calm.
This has always been the case. As long as Stanislav remembers himself, so much he was engaged in saving the marriage of his parents. When they moved away from each other, and a cold appeared between them, he began to worry. To be afraid that they will disperse and for this he will be to blame.
To prevent this from happening, he could get very sick. Or getting deuces in school and acting disgusting. Then the parents forgot about their squabbles and rushed to save their son. At this time, Stanislav was filled with pride and was glad that he was able to save his parents and their marriage.
Even now, pretending to listen and be ashamed, his contentment grew. He did it.
Secretly, glancing at his watch, he realized that it was time for him to leave. He made an appointment with his girlfriend. They planned to start living together. Rent an apartment, test your strength, and then create a family.
At that moment Stanislav froze, as if he had been doused with ice water. Breathing stopped: “What happens, as long as they are alive, I have to save their marriage? - this understanding made Stanislav numb. - And what about Katya? My plans with her? No, I don’t want that! There must be some way out …”He looked at his parents, whom he loved dearly, and with sadness in his heart thought that his mission had come to an end.
“Can I get them a dog? - for Stanislav it was an inspiration. - And what? They will take care of the dog, and for now I will arrange my personal life. She will not let them get bored. They will walk, educate. You won't drink much and you will come home from work on time. Otherwise, she will suit them here! Definitely a great idea."
Stanislav cheered up when he found such a solution. He looked at his mother, who said something about his conscience and ingratitude. Then at the father, nodding his head supporting his wife, and glancing reproachfully at him.
Stanislav felt warmth and love for his parents. Regret that he will leave the parental home. He will miss this, he is so accustomed to what has been done for many years that at some moment he was ready to abandon his idea. It's nice to be a lifeguard. But, having withstood the attack of this temptation, he resisted.
He interrupted his parents and asked him to listen:
- Until today, I have diligently guarded your marriage, doing stupid things that allowed you to stay together. Now that I have decided to build my own family and leave you, I got the idea that it would be good for you to have a dog. Since you avoid each other as a spouse, hiding behind alcohol or work, she will bond you together as owners of a four-legged friend. And this will save your marriage, and for me - your parents. I love you and it is important for me that you are together.
Having said this, Stanislav looked at his parents, who froze in surprise. He went towards the door, as he was already late for a meeting with Katya.
“Now they will think that I have lost my mind and will unite more, believing that I need their help. It looks like it scared them. I was certainly afraid to say that. We need to decide what kind of dog they should get …”- Stanislav reflected, closing the door.
From SW. gestalt therapist Dmitry Lenngren
