2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Observing myself and listening to the revelations of other women, I noticed that as soon as a woman tries to behave femininely in the outer world, in the inner world the influence of masculine energies immediately increases.
This manifests itself in the form of a controlling voice that whispers: “Here you need to listen carefully, without interrupting,” “Now you need to completely give up the initiative, demonstrate weakness,” “Speak this, but be silent about this”, etc.
Soon the same voice will accuse of improper diligence, tongue-tied, stupidity, inappropriate phrases.
There is no room for spontaneity, naturalness.
Real experience is replaced by opinions about how and what should or could be.
Outside - passivity, weakness, sacrifice, inside - a tough masculine principle that interferes with manifesting in their nature.
The deeper I dive into the study of the topic of female identity, the more I am convinced of the following.
When a woman says that she does not feel beautiful, feminine, sexy, it is not about the need to heal or save the inner woman (Anima) from the furious inner man (Animus).
More often than not, the potential for masculinity develops perversely. Projecting the positive aspects of the Animus outside (talents, abilities, capabilities, strength), she feels her inferiority inside. Outwardly - very strong, inside - weak, indecisive, afraid to act, defend herself, transform something in the outside world.
It is only at first glance that it seems that a woman lacks determination, action, manifestation, masculinity, but in fact she is captured by male energy, which manifests itself in the feeling that she is not understood, underestimated, in jealousy, comparison, in constant expectation of her chance., to show everyone, to prove their case.
And then, it is not necessary to “pump femininity”, but to heal the male part of the psyche, to free the female principle from the rubble of the wounded inner man.
There is a war going on inside her, in which femininity always loses. Inside, the male energies of a domineering authoritarian old man are raging, who demands obedience to the rules, outstanding external successes.
When a woman is not familiar with her Anima (feeling part), her Animus (mind, Logos) decides what she should be. To be more precise, a woman interacts with her Spirit (Animus) not in its entirety, but with the spirit of rationalization, which by its influence limits the depth of the potential for the realization of the Soul.
Like any archetype, the Animus has both positive and negative aspects of manifestation in the psyche of a woman.
Positive manifestations: activity in the outside world, courage, focus on the goal, discipline, focus of energy.
Negative traits of the Animus: serving false ideas, as a result of which the woman is not able to differentiate the adequacy of her inferences. This is not about madness, but about stereotypical judgments around which a woman builds her life, struggling with the otherness of views. Strict adherence to the beliefs “a man should”, “a woman should”, out of touch with reality is one example of the negative aspect of the Animus. In such cases, they speak of obsession, absorption by the Animus, or a negative paternal complex.
It can also be expressed:
1. In the construction of the desired images of oneself.
All thoughts wander around the fantasy of the existence of an "ideal version of herself", to which a woman is constantly striving. In its conception, the idea may be not bad, but in the form of implementation it is very neurotic: to devalue what is, to attach importance to what is not.
2. Another type of activity of the negative aspect is thinking about what should have been done differently in your life, what to achieve, what opportunities were missed, why, who is to blame, etc.
Regular transfers to the past and the future are unproductive fantasies that distract from real practical actions in the present.
3. The presence of a constant voice in the head, which comments on thoughts, feelings, behavior, sets the rules of life.
This leads to a decrease in adaptation to reality, the woman is engulfed in an unconscious struggle for power, control, rightness.
In Spanish, there is the word Dura, which translates as “hard”. A tough, categorical, controlling woman feels and is perceived by others as having grown older. I mean, she feels more like a "man" than a woman.
4. Dividing oneself into a "telome".
The Jungians call this the division of the Animus into spiritual and sentient parts.
The relationship with her own body is destroyed, the woman ignores or has difficulty identifying her physical needs. This often leads to weight problems and addictions. Disciplining your relationship with the body in a caring way, reestablishing a connection with it (with the one that is now, and not the one that once was or will be) helps to get in touch with repressed desires, needs, create a safe space to reconnect with feminine energy.
5. Idealization of the father figure and subsequent projections of a positive animus (discipline, courage, decision-making) on other men.
In this case, even though we are talking about the positive paternal aspect, excessive obsession with him will one day swing the pendulum to the opposite pole - the image of the "ideal man" will forever stand between a woman and a real man, she will project her own positive qualities onto him. As a result, the woman loses contact with her own strength, feels helpless, weak is identified with the role of the victim.
When a woman does not realize her potential, does not risk going into the outside world, coping with the challenges of the environment, she begins to blame her man for this. Finding no direct realization, the blocked energy seeks a way out either through self-destructive rage, or through anger and competition with a man.
Wounded, she will fight for supremacy over him, not realizing that she is dealing not with something outside of her, but with her own task of comprehending “the man in her”. In other words, with his Animus, who, with his authority and the power of suggestion, convinces a woman what she should be like, what her man should be, and there can be no other options. Identified with the Animus, she is filled with emotionally charged thoughts, categorical opinions, which over time completely subdue and control her.
