IVF And Oncology: Risks And Myths

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

IVF and oncology: risks and myths. Working as a family psychologist for 27 years, I regularly deal with the topic of in vitro fertilization (IVF). Over the years, the procedure has evolved from a piece and elite procedure to a massive and generally available one. My personal and professional attitude towards IVF is unequivocally positive. I saw with my own eyes the happiness of thousands of families, who, thanks to modern reproduction technologies, were able not only to have a child and give the opportunity to procreate to infertile men and women, but also to strengthen and preserve their marriage, destroy the insidious plans of mistresses and save a dad for an existing and newborn child. Therefore, the IVF procedure in the XXI century is one of the important tools in the work of a family psychologist. Although, of course, with a caveat:

During family crises, IVF should be carried out only when the man is unambiguously determined to strengthen and develop the family

Otherwise, with the position of a man, “I don’t know what I want: if you give birth, then we’ll see” or “I don’t want to marry you, you’ll get pregnant, then maybe”, you regularly have to help girls who have gone on difficult trials related with IVF, but later found themselves not just in an interesting position, but in the position of an abandoned single mother. Which is no longer interesting.

In the situation with IVF, there are many other nuances, risks and myths (one of the myths, for example, is IVF and oncology). Now I want to talk about the following: From time to time, information about oncological (or other serious) diseases and / or death of bright, famous, truly “star” girls gets into the media. Some of whom, some time before these events, resorted to the IVF procedure. Moreover, at a reproductively difficult age 35-40 +. (Sometimes, for various reasons, they cite as examples: Zhanna Friske, Mariah Carey, Anastasia Zavorotnyuk).

The widespread public resonance that arises from here often echoes in many ordinary families. And psychologists have to work with this. Here are some examples:

Immediately after such publications (IVF and oncology), many girls who either are currently carrying a pregnancy (obtained with IVF), or have already given birth, come with neuroses and moods that they are about to get sick and die. Not so long ago I talked with a patient who, after such broadcasts in the media, wanted to leave a "posthumous letter" to a small child (from IVF) if she suddenly had an unexpected death from brain cancer. Moreover, no oncology was revealed in her in principle! And as you can understand, the psychological climate in her family is not at all the most rosy. Especially taking into account her accusations to her husband that "it is you men who drive us women to death, sending us to IVF, and then marry the young yourself!" This is just a recent case, but there are many other stories.

For example, in some families, the very existence of the technical possibility of pregnancy and childbirth in adulthood provokes girls at the age of "30+" to strongly postpone the second, and sometimes even the first pregnancy "sometime for later." That somewhere leads men to adultery and illegitimate children. And somewhere - to the fact that women who have delayed pregnancy in the future cannot have children even with the help of IVF and lose their husbands.

We must not forget that postponing childbirth for the age of 40+ (regardless of whether conception occurred in the usual way or through IVF) can lead to a sharp increase in risks during pregnancy: frozen pregnancies, miscarriages, etc. It also happens that children born to very adult mothers and fathers turn out to have serious pathologies in physical and mental health. And, unfortunately, not all husbands, faced with such difficulties, behave with dignity and remain in the family.

In other families, the possibility of IVF up to the age of fifty, gives men, who are not yet psychologically ripe for fatherhood, to offer their wives to postpone childbearing "later". Like, if anything, medical technologies will help us. Stars give birth at the age of 40+ and 40 is strong +, which means that we can too! And if women are led by such masculine moods, often, then a variety of problems arise. After all, the financial capabilities of "stars" and average women, to put it mildly, differ greatly.

In third families (and this is a very common story), attempts by some media outlets to directly link the topic of IVF and the development of various cancers in women cause panic. Type: " IVF and oncology is the sign = ". This discourages overly impressionable girls (with reproductive problems) from IVF. Including very young girls 20+ and 30+, where IVF risks are insignificant, and the chances of getting pregnant from the first or second attempt are very high. As a result, these girls, instead of solving the existing gynecological problems in an essentially medical-scientific way, go the other way. They begin to turn to people who call themselves "witches", "healers", "healers", "psychics", "witches", "fortune-tellers", "shamans", "astro or exoteric psychologists", "female energy therapists", " cleaners of karma ", etc. Years go by, a lot of money is wasted, reproductive health is not improved, children are not born, the psyche changes significantly, husbands are running out of patience, families are crumbling.

Regularly working with such families and situations, I want to express my professional opinion, as a psychologist, on the topic of IVF and oncology

1 . ECO and oncology is not equal!

IVF by itself cannot provoke and cause oncological diseases, including brain cancer! A successful start of pregnancy from the first or second IVF procedure does not carry with it high risks of deteriorating health. As a pure practitioner of psychology, I will say even more:

Comprehensive examination of women in preparation for IVF

often allows you to timely identify existing

or just emerging cancers.

This is a common story: a woman turns to a psychologist for moral support, having learned about her oncological problems just in preparation for IVF. It is clear that IVF in these circumstances is no longer carried out. But even if there was no preparation for IVF, the woman would never have learned about her impending troubles in time, she would not have been able to successfully recover later. And so - everything ends well. A woman undergoes treatment on time, and then makes new decisions based on the situation.

2. The most correct IVF procedure is still under the age of forty

Why? Yes, simply because it is important to understand: the IVF procedure itself is just the “icing on the cake”, in fact it is the completion of a number of previous procedures. First of all - long-term hormone therapy for women. And it is precisely the activation of cell division caused by hormones that can accelerate the accumulation of those mutations in the cells of the body, which in the future can provoke oncological diseases. Although, you need to be objective: most often it is just about accelerating those processes that by this time already existed in the human body 40+. After all, it is no secret that in the body of many adults there are a wide variety of benign tumors, which are millimeters or several centimeters in size and grow. The development of which for the time being is restrained by the immune system of the organism itself. It's just that long-term hormone intake (especially with repeated IVF attempts) speeds up this process. But in this case, usually we are talking about the fact that the woman under-examined herself in preparation for IVF. I have heard many times: “I was in such a hurry that I either did not take some tests at all, or simply asked the doctors I knew to“draw”them in order to put them in the medical record set up in the reproduction center. So women are essentially deceiving themselves, creating unnecessary risks.

In girls, who are shown IVF, between the ages of 20 and 40, the risks of cancer with IVF are minimal. And over the past twenty years of my work, hundreds of children have already grown up as a result of IVF before my eyes. Moreover, their mothers are quite healthy and happy.

3. Do not rush to IVF with risk factors

That is, in the presence of severe chronic diseases, at the age of 40 it is strong +, or go to multiple repetitions of IVF procedures. Because, in this case, women are actually taking a serious risk, not always justified. Of course, the media regularly report that this or that celebrity has successfully become pregnant, carried and gave birth to a child with IVF, from some time in a row or in the presence of many contraindications. But ordinary women have other possibilities! And personally, I know many tragedies where after the fifth or tenth IVF (with hormone therapy on each episode), a woman's health was destroyed so much that we lost her forever. Therefore, for me, women who go to IVF at the age of 40+ or make five to ten (or even more) IVF attempts are real heroines who suffer for the sake of the happiness of motherhood! But from my point of view:

The heroism of motherhood with IVF should not be posthumous.

Therefore, when faced with difficulties with IVF, or with a general deterioration in health, I advise you to take a break and take months or years of break to improve your health. I know dozens of stories from practice, when reasonable breaks in reproductive procedures allowed women to give birth to a child and to preserve their own lives and health. Which is what I wish everyone.

4. After going through several unsuccessful IVF procedures, you should take a long pause or stop altogether

Especially if the woman already has a child. Unambiguously speaking in favor of childbirth, usually, I still ask men to take pity on their wives and not force IVF on those who are noticeably older than forty and have health problems, or have numerous unsuccessful IVF experiences, or already have a child in the family. Because:

Children should be associated with family happiness,

and not with the death of the mother.

The child has the right to grow up next to his own mother.

In my work, I have many times observed couples where men and their wives (especially women themselves) literally spurred the situation, trying to get pregnant with IVF in the literal sense of the word at any cost, regardless of any losses and risks. And I have successful couples where women happily become pregnant after undergoing more than a dozen fertilization procedures. However, in such cases, I then had to support women in overcoming breast cancer, ovarian cancer, etc. Should I risk so mortal? I doubt.

5. You should not shy away from childbearing at the age of 25-35 years, if the husband asks, and the family has enough

Let's be honest with ourselves: about half of IVF cases in adult women are fighting for a husband with young mistresses. When a woman did not consider it necessary to have a second (or first joint) child (enjoying the comfortable role of a housewife), until an ambitious competitor appeared and the smell of divorce did not arise. Hence, I always advise those women where there is wealth in the family, and the husband behaves quite decently: to be fruitful and multiply in that period of life that is optimal. In order not to take a mortal risk later at the age of 40+, when the prospect of starting to live anew looms ahead, and with a much lower level of income.

Of course, you can cite Monica Bellucci, Salma Hayek, Kim Bessinger, Eva Mendes, Halle Berry, who gave birth to a child at the age of 40+ as examples, but I emphasize again: they have completely different financial capabilities!

6. Before going for IVF, consider all alternatives

We are talking about:

• - ICSI procedure (carried out along with IVF);
• - such a radical improvement and change in the lifestyle of the spouses, which increases the likelihood of conceiving a child without medical technologies for reproduction;
• - material and psychological stimulation of adult children, so that they quickly acquire grandchildren who can satisfy the paternal and maternal needs of the parent couple (just help them buy their own home!);
• - adoption into a family for regular or permanent residence of grandchildren;
• - adoption of children of close and distant relatives (nephews, cousins, etc.) in case of difficulties in their families;
• - adoption (patronage) of children from orphanages;
• - surrogacy.

In our time, all these are real alternatives and this can and should be thought about.

Now the most important thing: As mentioned above, I am in favor of the IVF procedure! But only when the spouses made every effort to conceive naturally, without shifting all the responsibility to the doctors. And only at that age of a woman and in those circumstances when the risks to her life and health will be minimal, i.e. up to 35-37 years old. And of course, I really want to say to all respected women: “Please, do not postpone the birth of children until later! Do not deceive either your husbands (trying to avoid childbirth in principle) or yourself! Make no mistake about the omnipotence of medicine: after all, according to statistics, only no more than a third or half of IVF attempts are successful, and the likelihood of multiple actions is very high (with all sets of hormone therapy)! Do not equate yourself with "celebrity" women with other opportunities!

And having decided on IVF, do not intimidate yourself with rumors and gossip about the mortal danger of this procedure! Pass a full-fledged high-quality examination, create a positive attitude in your soul and family and forward to happy motherhood and fatherhood!

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If your married couple finds themselves in a crisis or there are conflicts over reproductive issues, fears about "IVF and oncology", I will be glad to give advice from a family psychologist on personal or online consultation (via Skype, Viber, Vatsap or phone)