2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
I remember how, at the beginning of my training in psychotherapy, a therapeutic itch woke up in me. I tried to treat everything that moves, offering practical and not very good advice to the people around me. It was both a desire to help, save, and a research interest - and what will happen if they do, as I suggest. It quickly became clear that understanding the emotional state of a person, on the contrary, was not enough to help. And I began to question, interpret, diagnose, treat a little more professionally, but still or without a request, or, if requested, it is still free, with sincere conversations in the kitchen, with a cup of coffee or a glass of wine. This is a normal stage in the development of the professional identity of any psychotherapist. And sooner or later it ends, because there is practice, experience, knowledge of oneself as a therapist, a sense of the value of one's work. Understanding that it is extremely rare for a person to take even very useful psychological help without paying anything for it. This is how we are made.
Now I know very well that figuring out a client's request is half the battle. Sometimes it so happens that the client does not need my interpretations or "undergo treatment", but simply needs, for example, direct and clear advice from a series, as I would have done. Or advice is not needed, but you just need my presence nearby, so that it is not so lonely and painful. There are situations when this is all that is needed, and it is as valuable as at another moment some experiment, interpretation, work with internal phenomenology, or at the border of contact may be in place. In my work, it is important to be able not to know in advance what they will come to you with today. And I really like it. I'm too curious to understand everything about the client in advance and suggest that he adapt to my expectations from him.
I work a lot with inquiries about relationships, and I take payment for my work: from clients - only in money. Sometimes outside of the therapeutic process I can help for a favor. And if I do not take money or services from a person, I try not to help. And not only because I value my work, but also because almost always free help does not give anything at best, at worst it is harmful.
I invite budding psychotherapists to explore their own therapeutic identity in supervision. I am studying at the 3rd stage of MGI. I hire supervisors for a fixed number of meetings at preferential rates. I will be glad to cooperate.
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