2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
When you really want something. When it seems that if I had this, then ….. Or if I was here, then ….. After "that" means something good.
So, if there is one important thing that needs to be done, to be this very "that".
Namely, it is very good to imagine the way of life that will pull this desire, or goal, or dream. Present adequately, without rose-colored glasses. See, hear and feel what will happen when the goal is achieved.
Because if a certain goal is presented as a beautiful fairy tale-dream in pink tones, then I would seriously think about it.
So that upon achievement it does not turn out that they have achieved something wrong.
Otherwise, you can be very surprised. It's unpleasant. Pink glasses break glass inward.
Because a person works in an office and dreams of freelancing. Such a freelance, which with a hammock on the seashore. And then it turns out that freelancing is not so little. And a hammock there, in principle, is possible, but working in a hammock is at least inconvenient. Because freelancing is a job, after all. And the purpose of this work is to earn money. And for this you need to sell yourself, and a lot of things. Considering that “a lot of things,” the office job might not seem so bad.
And I do not like this word, but I cannot find another one yet. Pay. There is a price to pay for a goal or desire. Willingness to do something to achieve what you want. Take some steps. Give up something or get something. Give or take. Learn or unlearn.
And when this payment is paid (and the person has achieved what he wants), it may turn out that the goal is pulling a lifestyle that the person does not like. How to buy ice cream that doesn't taste good. But you can throw away ice cream, but in life you cannot throw away everything.
It's like wanting to live in another country without ever having been in this country. No matter how much you read articles and watch videos, the reality may be different. Because articles about countries are written by other people, they have a different picture of the world.
And a little from personal experience. Once upon a time I quit smoking. I quit successfully for many years. Even before I started to take an interest in NLP and psychology. So, I liked the lifestyle of my non-smoking friends. I was a little jealous of them. I wanted to be like them (in this context). That is, in the movies, I wanted to watch a movie for two hours and not go anywhere in the middle of the movie. And at work to work, and not rush every hour to the smoking room and back. Etc. I wanted to be a non-smoker, and I wanted the lifestyle that implies. And for the sake of this, I was ready to endure temporary inconveniences (namely, abstention syndrome).
Because if a person likes a smoking lifestyle (there is a secondary, in other words), then it will be difficult to quit. Why give up what you like? And if you don't like a nonsmoking lifestyle, then even more so. (I will write separately about the secondary housing from bad habits, I will not dwell on this here.)
If you want some kind of goal, and you like the lifestyle that this goal implies, then maybe this is it. A real desire worth trying for.
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