FACES OF NARCISSISM

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Narcissism is almost impossible to recognize in oneself, especially this is complicated by the situation when the whole world is suffering from this epidemic. A person is not able to see himself, considers himself right, kind, depravity is easily passed off as dignity.

Do not think that all daffodils are always bright and catchy personalities. The faces of narcissism are varied. Some narcissistically organized individuals may be zealous in helping and caring for others. Narcissists use different techniques: modesty, and deliberate inconspicuousness, and ostentatious love for people. If such a person manages to convince others that he is worthy of admiration, then everything is fine, but if you do not show due respect, then a real devil will break out of a quiet, modest, unassuming sweet person.

Everyday ideas about narcissism are limited only to the identification of the concept itself with something "bad". Meanwhile, there is healthy narcissism, which is an emotionally rich, productive and fulfilling life. Healthy narcissism allows you to make fun of yourself, your shortcomings, dive deep inside yourself in order to create something unique, your own, and leave a trace of your activities in the world.

Healthy narcissism makes it possible to feel emotions in all their diversity, to share your emotional life with other people, to separate reality from fantasies, and at the same time to dream, along with the ability to go towards your goal, to enjoy success without getting hung up on gnawing doubts.

Healthy narcissism provides a person with a sense of mental integrity, self-control, a sober assessment of the situation and his role in it. Such a person depends little on the assessments of other people, is capable of adaptive behavior and detoxification of his own feelings of shame and insecurity. This is not about the façade complacency, which is the case with pathological narcissism, but about the conviction of one's own potential. Healthy narcissism keeps a person from pessimism and gives hope for a change for the better. A declaration of complete indifference to others' assessment of their own success signals a narcissistic vulnerability, such bravado hides the fear of negative assessment, while healthy narcissism allows you to recognize some influence of other people and feel regret about their negative assessment. In healthy narcissism, reactions to external flaws can be characterized as regret rather than shame. Healthy narcissism allows you to realize the potential of your own sociability and open your feelings to other people quite widely, if necessary, such a person knows how to establish and maintain social contacts. In interpersonal relationships with such people it is easy and pleasant to interact, since they are open, and they do not have a facade in communication. Being healthy, a person is included in the implementation of his plans, but he is also free to make no plans in certain situations, he allows himself to withdraw into his inner world, self-contemplation and enjoyment of peace. Healthy narcissism fosters a success and social performance mindset, taking into account the limits of one's abilities; provides not only the opportunity to set goals and go towards them, but also to experience pleasure from the very process of productive work. Being healthy, a person respects the autonomy of others and understands the desire of the other at some point in time to be alone. Healthy narcissism provides an opportunity to enjoy the success of others without feeling jealous or humiliated, and guarantees independence of choice and the ability to change internal orientations. Recognizing the existence of external ideals, such a person is able to independently formulate the principles of his life. Safeguarding its territory, healthy narcissism cuts off any attempts to interfere with its borders, which are not intended for other people. Healthy narcissism provides a person with self-sufficiency and strong support in himself, which makes it possible to avoid dramatization in situations of violation of the partner's fidelity. Healthy narcissism keeps a person from being overly concerned about his health, at the slightest discomfort, such a person does not rush to the doctor and does not call an ambulance, but is able to take care of himself without ignoring the symptoms and admitting that the onset of the disease is possible.

A person who is in captivity of narcissistic values performs actions and deeds that are contrary to the mind and interests of this person as a human being. Obsessed with these drives, a person suppresses himself, becomes more cruel, emasculated and spiritless, subordinating his life to stereotypes. Despite all its activity, it is sterile. It must be admitted that in this case there is a possibility for such a person to achieve, probably, even significant results that lead to material success, despite the fact that the person is not free. Does fruitfulness mean obligatory practical results, or does the concept of fruitfulness refer to the orientation towards the world of the person himself in the process of life, his character? If a person treats productivity as a practical result, success, cutting off the second part of the question, this indicates an atrophy of creative perception. A person who succumbs to narcissistic temptations perceives things as they are considered to be in culture, his perception is dead, unable to give these things a personal color. The view of reality is distorted due to a lack of depth and perspective. But there is another danger: the atrophy of the ability to see the "manifested" world, to perceive it reproductively leads to the fact that a person cannot establish communication with reality and adaptively function socially.

Only true fruitfulness, combining the reproductive and creative functions of perception, makes it possible to see the world as it is and to enrich it with our own energy.

For those who have fallen into the narcissistic trap and are trying to get out of it, I will say that any deep reforms are dramatic, the reform of your own personality, capable of living outside the walls of a narcissistic palace, requires effort, willingness to take risks and the belief that you will be rewarded for your perseverance. Trust that your time will come and that what you desire is achievable. The winner's wounds heal faster!

Do not let the issues of narcissism out of your field of vision, fine-tuning your optics, determine how this vice can take root in your life: either in the form of imperative cultural regulations, turning you into nothing more than an artifact, or in the person of a "king" using you as a nursing retinue.

Do not forget about the role you play in the fate of narcissistic people and that you are the one who supports his myth of greatness. Well, if it is so scary to become a "apostate of faith" and gain faith in yourself, then sooner or later you will still be burned at the stake of narcissistic madness.