2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
A parental prohibition on life or a script message "Don't live" is most often adopted by a child in the form of a prohibition to want, to have desires of his own.
Often the prohibition against desire is expressed in the role of the Rescuer, who learns to enjoy life through the joy of fulfilling the desires of other people.
Only by saving another, a person with a ban on life, receives an ersatz of joy and thinks how good it is when the other is good. Well, I don't need anything.
It can be very difficult for such a person to understand his desires - he actually physically feels the inner block, when asked: "What do I want?"
The "Don't live" scenario is a message from the side of the parental figure, which is accepted by a young child as the priority of the parent's wishes and wishes over his desires.
How to understand your desires when prescribing "Don't Live"?
Every reader of the article will probably remember doing the "100 Wishes" practice on Christmas Eve.
How? Hard. You could hear the gears in your brain turning. Many suddenly began to cry, realizing that they did not know what they wanted.
By the way, the author of the article is an adherent of the idea that the lack of desires is not a consequence of depression, but on the contrary, depression most often affects people who do not know what they want. People who accepted the script "Don't Live".
The maximum that each "practitioner" knew and could clearly answer - this is what he definitely does not want. Horror.
This is what the practice of "how to understand what I want" is based on.
Take a piece of paper and dividing it in half, conduct a negative brainstorming session with yourself, in the first column again and again answer the question:
"What I definitely don't want under any circumstances?"
This is where things will go livelier. I checked.
When the first column is filled with answers to this question, take a break for a couple of days and seek 1-2 consultations with a script psychologist.
At these meetings, you will need to remember the situations in which you accepted the ban on desires and undergo re-decision therapy in order to receive "permission to live", permission to have your desires without feeling guilty.
After that, go back to the piece of paper and fill in the second column with your desires based on what you DO NOT want. Literally opposite concepts.
The second option, to understand what you want is to spy on what others want and taste their wishes, try them on for yourself. If you like it - take it!
Recommended:
Your Own Life Or A Relay Race From Your Childhood? The Right To Your Life Or How To Escape From The Captivity Of Other People's Scripts
Do we ourselves, as adults and successful people, make decisions on our own? Why do we sometimes catch ourselves thinking: "I am now speaking like my mother"? Or at some point, we understand that the son repeats the fate of his grandfather, and so, for some reason, it is established in the family … Life scenarios and parental prescriptions - what impact do they have on our destiny?
Masks In Our Lives. I Will Give An Answer To The Question Of How To Be Yourself And Understand Your True Desires
For 12 years of private and clinical practice, many people came to me who lived in masks, did not understand much about themselves and their desires. The social or psychological mask "I please everyone", "I am worse than others"
Technique For Working With The Unconscious. How To Understand Your True Desires And Problems
There are times in the workplace in which a person's true problems and desires are not obvious. Or a person himself doubts what exactly he wants, what exactly worries him. For such cases, there is an excellent technique for working with the unconscious.
How To Calmly Relate To Desires And Understand That Not Everything Depends On Me?
In everyday life, peace is always lacking. But we all know the feeling of self-confidence when we know that everything will work out for us. There is one simple thing. You will be able to relate calmly to goals and desires if you perceive them only as goals and desires.
How To Live YOUR Life, Not The Life Of Your Parents
In the family system, all of its members are interconnected. And there is a place for everyone. For example, children are in front of their parents in order to be able to lean on them. The grandparents are behind the parents, and so on. The ancestors behind our backs support, give a sense of acceptance, security and strength.
