2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
1. The most important, necessary condition for any interaction, be it a conversation with a colleague, with relatives, or in the process of coaching, is a multilevel contact, called Rapport
The coaching process can be more effective, even if the coach does not act according to the coach model. Can't believe it? Try it!
To achieve, and most importantly, maintain rapport, there are various methods and ways
Short Term Tuning Methods: Meta post. Pose. Rhythm. Gestures. Voice and speech.
Long term methods: Values. Neurological levels.
2. Contact levels
The level at which the rapport is created and maintained is also important.
1. Experience or experiences … "We lived in the same city", "We studied at the same institute"
2. Concepts … Similarity of ideas, picture of the world, assumptions about how reality works, attitude to certain things and events.
3. Intention … The client wants something and is ready to do something for this, and the coach coincides with him at this level, because he wants to help the client in this.
4. Motivation … If our motivations do not coincide, or are simply directly opposite, then naturally it will be more difficult to understand a person. If they coincide, then it will be easier to understand a person, but it may be more difficult to clarify his "blind spots".
5. Development. If the leader of the company wants to meet each subordinate in his reality, it will be difficult. He needs to create his own reality (corporate culture), which would be captivating for everyone and unite them with one mission.
3. Clarification of the situation
Usually, in the process of coaching, the maximum time is spent on clarification.
First of all, you need to figure out what it feels like present state client and what is desired … And what is needed to move from one to the other.
The coach can ask expanding questions. For example, “tell us more about it”, “can you tell me more about it”, “what is most important to you?”, “What is most important?”
If the client is talking a lot and this reduces clarity, then narrowing questions can be asked. Such as "Could you summarize?", "What's the most important thing here?"
There is another way to clarify - a question like "help me understand", "help me figure it out."
If the client speaks in general terms but does not get down to the details, then we can assume that he will have clarity when he finally begins to detail. Conversely, if he delves into a detailed description, then the big picture is more difficult for him to present.
There are direct indicators of clarity, when a client says: “I understand, now everything is clear,” - his state changes. There are indirect signs - gestures, calibrations, energy levels, and a willingness to commit.
One of the techniques for bringing clarity is modeling, virtual replay of a situation that a person is thinking about. Suggestions to play, try yourself in different roles give a good experience. And then the client understands how he can feel in certain conditions and prepare.
4. Responsibility of the client
Surely you more than once had to meet with how often people do not want to take responsibility and how skillfully they know how to shift it onto others. Have you ever been these others?
Signs of taking responsibility: having an effective plan, energy, taking on costs and consequences, aligning with values, willingness to connect additional resources and people to the process.
You can check this directly by asking if he knows what he is going to do based on the above. You can ask the client to set time limits: if he is ready to do this within a week or a month, then this means that he has already made a commitment.
5. Support and frustration
During the session, in order to evoke the client's energy, the coach may need to simulate the consequences of his inaction in the client, provoke or support the client emotionally, without nudging him to anything in particular.
Sincere support works wonders, and a good provocation challenges the client.
Both can be good coaching tools when used in situ.
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