What's The Point?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Meaning strengthens our connection to life and protects us from despair.

Alfried Langle

In one of the groups of psychological support and mutual assistance, a post was recently published - I retell it in my own words - how to find, being a non-religious and childless person, a sense of the meaningfulness of life? Or, rather, to find it again, lost?

And under the post there were many consonant comments. I lost my post - it's a very active group! But for me this is also a topic, and it comes back periodically. Well, these are existential crises in life =) and, whatever you call it, it always goes hard.

The most difficult thing is to bring into reality, to translate into actions what one manages to realize. To draw, say, practical conclusions. It is difficult to accept the loss of illusion, or rather, to learn about something that it was, in fact, an illusion. It is difficult to be without feelings, in apathy, without a taste for life. It is even more difficult to start acting again from this new situation.

In the existential-analytical approach of psychotherapy (to which I have the honor to belong and to which I was nailed just during the next crisis - already 8 (!) Years ago) - the question of meaningfulness is central. Theoretically, everything looks transparent and organic to me (I will not explain here, so as not to flatten). Find in yourself what you can give to the world. In practice, a lot of internal work. Which has to start somewhere.

Here's what I think now:

Sometimes too ambitious tasks, too high values and too far-reaching prospects undermine us. There is too intense a rhythm of life. You can just overstrain. One of the consequences of grandiose swings is the devaluation of simpler, "small" values - this is the state when you cannot rejoice in simple things. The taste of life is lost. And to yourself you begin to seem so small and worthless, not worthy of anything better

There is no sense - this initial existential-philosophical thesis sometimes saves. In fact, this is the easiest thing to do - to decide, it just makes no sense to close the topic. But by doing so, we are locked in a sense of doom - this is horror as existential, of course, but it does not raise the mood.

1. And if you descend from heaven to earth? (As one of my headmistresses used to say to me, be not remembered by that). Feel the meaning right under your feet? I know the reaction “What? Me, who dreamed of millions / save humanity / be a genius, etc. - to look for sense in throwing a piece of paper in the trash and not on the pavement? Damn it! " Guys, there will be nothing without feeling the value and respect for every step. Do you spend hours watching TV series? - recognize what their value and meaning are for you. They definitely are.
2. The crisis of loss of meaning is often - almost always - accompanied by a sinking into loneliness. Again, this is the existential “man comes into the world alone and leaves it alone”. We move away from other people - busy with vanity, but it still does not make sense. Even those close to us do not fully understand.

In general, a period of solitude is natural and necessary. (True, solitude as such and the feeling of loneliness are not the same thing, but this is not the point now.) Reflection, meditation, the “conservation of energy” mode - all these are mandatory procedures within the framework of planned work on replenishing the resource and reassessing values.

But don't miss the moment when you can / should return. To begin with, look at other people, their relationships, communication, emotions. By the way, TV shows are just about that, in many ways. Sense is impossible without dialogue with the world, and dialogue with the world is impossible without dialogue with people.

The body has its own meanings. Listen to him too. It can easily share meaning for every day. First of all, remember to breathe in the outside air and move. Physical wellness is something worth considering.