Getting Rid Of Trauma: How, Why And What Will Happen After?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Getting rid of trauma: how, why and what will happen after?

We experience many events every day. Some of them are significant, others are checkpoints. Some of them are pleasant: we rejoice, making sure that we are on the right path. But the real impact on us is incidents that cause negative reactions. Such events can cause complexes or psychological trauma.

Sometimes experiences are so strong that a person cannot come to terms with what happened and live on. Such experience is "encapsulated" and goes into the unconscious part of the psyche. Memory rejects the experience, but it remains as a painful imprint. In the future, we try to do whatever we want to avoid the repetition of such situations.

Trauma turns life into existence

It turns out to be a confusing situation: negative experience and its painfulness are denied by the conscious part of the psyche, but the subconscious part keeps it and tries to avoid everything in life that at least a little reminds of a traumatic story.

Moreover, the earlier the injury occurs, the stronger the imprint. Childhood traumas are experienced especially strongly, although we do not seem to remember them and mask them with stories about a happy childhood. The causes of injury include relationships with parents, hospitalizations, dog attacks, and relationships with peers.

The traumatized person does not choose new opportunities, does not take risks, does not listen to his feelings

Of course, psychological trauma can be received not only in childhood. Common examples of injuries at a conscious age are assault, violence, separation, divorce. It is very important that the fear of repetition of trauma begins to govern the person's choice and life. His behavior narrows to stable scenarios, the quality of life decreases, and inner peace is lost.

But the worst thing is that the traumatized person is ready to make significant sacrifices. He lives on half of his strength and resources, just not to touch the past painful experience. At the same time, it seems to him that the events that occurred earlier do not have any influence on him and do not bother him.

The traumatized person does not choose new opportunities, does not take risks, does not listen to his feelings. For a woman after divorce or violence, it can be fear of starting a family. For a child once abandoned, it is an obsession to be always in a relationship, and their quality does not matter - just not to be left alone. And the one who was overly patronized in childhood may simply not trust people, fearing that they will manipulate him. This is expressed in panic attacks or the desire to constantly control a partner.

How can you tell if you have had an injury?

Emotional signs:

• dependence on a partner;
• difficulty in managing emotions and feelings (irritability, outbursts of anger, guilt, shame, anxiety, fears and feelings of depression);
• isolation, difficulties in contacts with other people;
• lack of trust in the world;
• difficulties with learning and concentration;
• you do not feel like a whole person, you seem to be lost;
• problems in building relationships.

Physical signs:

• fatigue, lethargy;
• muscle hypertonia, especially in the calves and back;
• headaches;
• inability to relax and rest;
• sleep disturbance;
• psychosomatic diseases (according to various estimates of psychologists, from 80 to 100% of psychosomatic diseases develop due to trauma).

When to start working on trauma?

Many people are afraid to deal with trauma, thinking that it may entail withdrawing into negative emotions. "I'm not ready now, sometime later." It is important to understand that it is the trauma that dictates our habitual strategy: to postpone until later, to pretend that this does not exist and that everything is not so bad.

Under the influence of trauma, our potential is reduced. Our self-confidence is undermined. We become hostages of the past. Fear or unwillingness to contact a painful memory not only increases its power over us, but also creates internal tension, leads to anxiety and depressive states. Until we have worked through the trauma, we do not live.

First step: dissolution

It is very important not to try to "freeze" or switch, driving the injury deeper. The following actions will help:

• It is necessary to be "in contact" with the experience, to burn off it. Cry, talk out, allow yourself to receive support from loved ones.
• Help others. Often such help allows you to mobilize, find strength and for your own recovery.
• Recognize and name your emotions. This allows one to disidentify with the experience, to look at it from the outside. When we remain one with the problem, we feel helpless.
• Put pain and experience on paper. It is advisable to do this exercise for at least 30 minutes. Prescribing sensations, we begin to work with them, becoming a subject, not an object.
• Drawing your feelings gives the same effect. Take paper and draw what you feel, naming this feeling. The artistic component is not important here. It can be just colors, shapes - whatever you want. The main thing is not to limit yourself.

Second step: contacting a specialist

Even the best psychotherapists, when injured, turn to colleagues without trying to get out of the hole on their own. This is due to the fact that the pain becomes dear, and it is too difficult to completely separate it from yourself. Therefore, it is advisable to leave the second step to a specialist.

There are many different ways to get rid of the burden of injury. But the only way that works is to start working on yourself.

One of the most effective methods of dealing with trauma involves body therapy and is based on deep diving into oneself. You lie on the couch with vibrations similar to those of babies.

It has been scientifically proven that a special oscillation frequency balances the impulses of the right and left hemispheres of the brain and, as a result, a connection with intuition and the unconscious arises. In the process, you relax, immerse yourself in your own body, experiencing bodily experience and gaining a resource.

After the first session, you gain the ability to see the incident in a new light, with a mature understanding of what really happened. And, most importantly, why this happened. The result of the work is felt immediately: the "core" of the trauma disappears, as well as its emotionally negative color.

What will happen after?

Over the long time spent side by side with endless experiences, we get used to them. And we get used to the feeling of guilt. We justify our impotence. And when all this monstrous burden is gone, there is a feeling of freedom. This is a lightness that can only be felt by someone who for years dragged immeasurable weights on himself, and then threw them off.

There are many different ways to get rid of the burden of injury. But the only way that works is to start working on yourself. Separate from the injury, see a specialist. To spread my wings and start living again.

About the expert

Dmitry Berger- a psychologist, a body therapist, an instructor in meditation practices, the author of the Rapid Change Therapy methodology, formed on the basis of psychosynthesis (a method of psychotherapy and self-development), bodily and meditative techniques. More details on the site.