How Do You Meet Your Thoughts?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2024-01-07 22:18

Most of us have so many thoughts that over time we mix with them and say so: "I am my thoughts." Such an assumption makes sense only if you pronounce it from the understanding that we are a single formless unity, capable of being aware of perceptions, thereby endowing them with form. If it is assumed that perceptions and “I” are inseparable, and that by “I” is meant awareness, then the expression “I am my thoughts” makes sense. But I have a suspicion that most of those who say this mean something else.

Before I began to explore the mind, I believed by definition that the mind is the place where my thoughts live. I thought that the mind is the brainchild of the brain and that all my thoughts are the “products” of the brain. The neurons flashed in one sequence - and I think: "Finally it has started snowing!" They lit up in another - and I feel sad: “Oh, there would be more snow …” In my understanding, the very process of “lighting” neurons in a certain sequence generated a certain thought - in other words, “lighting” was the cause, and the thought was the effect.

Today we are beginning to realize that the "highlight" does not evoke thoughts, but rather reflects them. We find that the thought begins to be realized before the "highlight" occurs. Thus, we come to the conclusion that the "illumination" of neurons on a brain scan in real time is a reflection of the processes taking place, but not the cause of them.

Like other processes that accompany being a person, thoughts are an uncontrolled, self-willed process. Examining the mechanics of my mind “from the inside,” I found that the mind lends itself to training: although thoughts tend to appear in a certain sequence, the reaction to thoughts can be different, which, in turn, determines the thoughts that will appear later.

Suppose I tend to wake up in a bad mood. As soon as I open my eyes in the morning, an Everest of anxiety descends on me. By highlighting worried thoughts, I can choose how I respond to them. According to the habit inherent in every cell of my body, I want to curl up under the everest in a ball and talk about anxiety. But if I am not too lazy and wonder if there is an opportunity to change my experience, I will one day come across a technique of emotional acceptance, the practice of contemplation, the development of mindfulness, positive psychology, or meditation. All of this will help me turn my mental "rushes" into moments of working on myself, and over time I may even find that I am beginning to anticipate a new influx of thoughts and accompanying feelings in order to practice working on them. After weeks and months, I will most likely notice that my inner space has become much quieter. I will feel confident because I will know that I have strength. I will know that if unpleasant thoughts come, I will be able to meet them correctly, and they will no longer torment me.

Here are some ways to transform your thought relationship:

1. Examine your thoughts. Explore: Are thoughts controllable? Can you forcibly not think? If so, what is achieved by suppressing thoughts? Peace or tension? Love or compulsion? Personally, it upsets me that the mind is demonized: sometimes meditation teachers insist on “suppressing” the mind, as if the mind is the source of all troubles. The uncontrollability of thoughts is a natural feature of being a person who has lived his entire life in modern society. Suppressing thoughts is just as harmful as suppressing emotions. Understanding your mind is a much more caring and friendly process.

2. Notice that thoughts are one of two components of what we call emotion. The second component of emotion is the physical sensation in the body. When thoughts come to you, notice that they are always accompanied by a bodily sensation. For example, how are you feeling now? Please note that if you have a pronounced bodily feeling, then there is a thought that provoked it - it simply “slipped” into your inner space “without registration”. Even if it is a feeling of mild dissatisfaction or boredom: what do you think that you have such a subtle feeling?
3. Realize that thoughts are a product of growing up in a social environment, in a particular culture. Thoughts often arise from beliefs and assumptions: "No one will ever love me, I am not worthy of love." “Unconditional love is impossible; there is always a catch and a benefit in everything. " "People are evil." Highlight your assumptions and examine them for plausibility. Are you sure that this is the case? That this assumption reflects universal truth? At what point did you absorb this belief? Who put it in you? I recommend Byron Katie's “Work” method.

4. Every time unpleasant thoughts come, note that they are not your fault. No one is to blame for thinking their thoughts. Give yourself permission to think unloving, negative thoughts. Suffering arises when we resist thoughts, are afraid that they will overtake us again. In working with thoughts, it is important to understand that all our thoughts are the product of our cultural programs, beliefs, assumptions about the world and other people. By resisting a certain type of thought, we create suffering in an attempt to prevent suffering. The very fact that thoughts came suggests that they could not but come. Remind yourself of this every time you have thoughts. You can choose to trace them back to their source (trauma from childhood or early childhood beliefs, for example), but even that is not necessary.
5. Thank every thought for coming and telling you something. You can say so: "Thanks for the information." You don't have to be led by the thought and experience what it prompts you to experience. Of course, to be sure of this, you need to come to this conclusion yourself. The practice of Contemplation is effective here: notice what the thought prompts you to do. See why she wants you to do this. What inner wound are you trying to protect by thinking your thoughts? The more truths you realize about yourself, the clearer your inner space becomes. Most of the people on the planet today have grown up and continue to live in an environment of emotional ignorance, where some feelings are encouraged and others condemned. It creates a "skew" towards "positive" thoughts, while "negative" thoughts are suppressed. A truly happy and mentally healthy person should be able to experience any thoughts and emotions and remain unaffected (see "Suppressing and Living Emotions").
6. Open up to all thoughts. Do not be afraid that if you think a negative thought, and even more so - with the prefix "not", then the universe will readily multiply your suffering. Openness to all thoughts is like an open door - all guests can come in and even stay for a while, but as soon as they get bored or there are more important things to do, they will immediately leave of their own accord.

Working with thoughts is an interesting process. We are not taught to work with thoughts - but in vain. Thoughts are a phenomenon known to every person. Like all manifestations of the world, thoughts lend themselves to refinement - but you just need to know how.

With love, Lilia Cardenas, integral psychologist