2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Emotional burnout of a helping professional. Observation of one phenomenon
Ignorance of our inner state, not the ability to see what is happening in us and what our psychological and spiritual age is, not the desire to think about it, without trying to find out first of all, we think (imagine ourselves) that we have everything in our inner life safely.
There are excellent examples of professional dedication, dedication and love for people. These people seem to be professional saints. They want to imitate, inherit, and sometimes a helping professional throws himself into "holiness" headlong. In Orthodoxy, there is a concept of spiritual delight, which means
"Deceptive holiness", accompanied by the highest and very subtle form of flattery to oneself, self-deception, dreaminess, pride, an opinion about one's own dignity and perfection.
The fact is that the “saints” saw what was happening in them, and what they needed as a result of this, therefore they chose deeds for themselves that corresponded to their inner state. An “adept” who does not look at himself, does not come into contact with his inner needs sets goals for himself without any connection with the inner state, to put it simply, he will invent.
Without knowing himself, a person imagines that he can take on any business: accept ten clients a day, work without material remuneration, extend the session time, participate in the life and psychological state of clients between sessions and perform various other professional "feats". And having undertaken such a mission, the person “rushes” with all his might, condemning the “mercantile” and “spiritually weak” colleagues.
Not seeing himself, what he really is (and what he really wants), a person "thinks" of himself that he is good, honest, everything is in order, therefore, having chosen some attractive goal for himself, strives for her with all the foolishness. This is based on imaginary, sometimes invented exaggerated values, the desire to be "above" everyday abomination.
Therefore, a person who wants to provide assistance to another needs to, first of all - to know himself! Now I'm not talking about "elaboration", this is a beautiful slogan that increases the confidence of clients in specialists, but those who have gone through this "mandatory study" know that, in fact, this is still a trap (I understand and respect all the diversity of experience).
Example. Woman, 28 years old. Received a second higher education with a degree in Psychology. Impressed by the works of K. Rogers, I. Yalom, M. Buber. Raises a flag with the inscription "Meeting against crutches" (my provocation). Sets a "dubious" price tag for services (lack of experience taken into account). For two years he has been working "without sleep or rest." Works, but doesn't make money. People begin to annoy, the profession tires, it can no longer "meet" anyone.
Life situation. The woman lives with her parents, which makes her very burdensome, wants to buy a house, it is possible to continue her studies (it is interesting to study). But there are no material resources. The "holiness" approach of getting what you want doesn't promise. But she is a specialist who "serves, accepts everyone, does not use crutches, does not read a single vulgar test."
Adopted and implemented decisions of a woman:
- service price increase by 35%
- reduction of the number of clients to 4 per day
- appeal to the "feeling" communicated by "not my client" and the determination to refuse
- refusal of contacts with clients between sessions
- two days off a week
- seeking supervision
- keeping a "specialist diary"
- mastering techniques to relieve symptoms in clients.
Results to date
- satisfaction with the results of work, in which the number of meetings that the distinguished Rogers, Yalom and Buber talk about has increased
- no confusion in client cases requiring "ambulance"
- recognition of the whole range of needs related to the profession
- an increase in material well-being and the emergence of real prospects for buying a home
- "it's easier for me to live, create, love"
P. S. We do not have enough truthful stories about the daily work of psychotherapists, about our despair, confusion, loss of orientation, the feeling of "Sisyphean labor"; stories of "rebirth", humility, struggle with pride and rejection of "charm".
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