2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Self-confidence is associated with self-confidence. Uncertainty means "I don't believe myself." I don't believe I can handle it. I am afraid that something will happen to me that I cannot bear. I doubt that at a difficult moment, I will act in the best possible way and will not destroy myself for not being up to par. This means that when I am not coping with something, I will reject myself. I can leave myself, criticize, devalue and condemn when things get tough. How can you trust someone who betrays?
Where does self-disbelief come from? We remember an anecdote:
Odessa. Yard.
- Abramchik, go home!
- Mom, am I cold?
- No, you want to eat!"
The child learns to rely on the opinions of others, with a deep conviction that they know best what is happening to him. Against the background of distrust of one's experiences, assessments and actions, a connection with the "inner self" is not formed, which, over time, should have turned into an inner core. Adults also create shame for certain feelings. Some children, according to the elders, should not be angry, confused, feel powerless and make mistakes. Others - to show off, be proud, celebrate success and, in general, be very emotional. Real different feelings are replaced by one - shame. And already as an adult, a person constantly doubts himself, he does not know what he really feels, and if he does, he is not sure whether what is happening to him is normal.
The cause of self-doubt can be a long-term unfavorable situation, when a person slowly and imperceptibly undermines something, depriving him of faith in his own strength. Likewise, stress or a sufficiently strong shock can knock out support and make you doubt yourself.
But in all cases, it will be healing to return to yourself, to your inner supports. It may turn out that they are destroyed or undergrown. And here the conscious work of an adult begins to cultivate and strengthen himself.
Self-confidence is the knowledge that no matter how bad or good I feel, I will not betray myself and give up. I will be with myself in fear and confusion, I will be with myself in shame and awkwardness. I will take the risk of presenting my feelings and needs, my interests and thoughts, even if it is different from others. I will stand behind my back and support.
When self-confidence develops, control over life and other people decreases. And above yourself, of course, too. Then you can relax and trust … life, others and yourself …
Self-confidence is a huge resource for self-support. When I believe in myself, it means that I am not alone. I have me and we can handle it. And even if this resource is exhausted, then honestly admitting this to yourself, you can go look for it. The world is big, you are not alone.
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