2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Many women dream of a strong, attentive and caring man. Some openly say “to be like my dad”, others - “just not like my father” and, of course, find a similar one.
The relationship between a daughter and a father can be different - difficult and toxic, warm and open. A father can be both cruel and oppressive, as well as considerate and supportive.
Parents, this is always a roulette wheel. We do not choose them. We are content with how it turned out. But dad is always for a woman the one through whom she begins her acquaintance with the world of men, he is the gateway to this world. Even if there has never been a father in a woman's life. She will still be in contact with his inner image through his mother. And if this image is ugly and creepy, then the attitude towards men will be formed.
Of course, the desire to love, protect and provide, and I'm all like that in white and on a pedestal, it's about dad.
A woman almost by force keeps herself in this pattern, keeps herself in a little girl. I just want my dad to replace me, and that's it! It's more like consumerism. Give it to me - you owe it.
But even parents do not owe anything to their children, they take care only in their own way and it is a joy to them, or at least a peace of mind, and if from a state they must and must, then this is about codependency.
What prevents a woman from filling herself with love and care? Support and inspire yourself?
- Like what? - the woman is often indignant, - After all, they did not love me! I was not taught to love myself!
But it is impossible to teach what is inherent in us from the very beginning. Such a claim, “I don't know how to support myself, because I was not taught,” is more about childhood grievances and emptiness in which a woman is stuck. And blind love for dad, which a woman often excludes and does not want to admit, is also about inner emptiness.
Dad is given once. All other options are a surrogate fake, fear of the world of men, the exclusion of your Animus. Eternal vegetation in the inner girl.
Being a girl means throwing off both guilt for your mistakes and responsibility. This is NOT to grow and NOT to promote yourself in life, this is a betrayal of your uniqueness and intrinsic value, it is NOT to have an impact even on yourself when you want to rule over the whole world of men.
This is an eternal dependence on someone else's will and desire, on mood and quirks. This is a chronic conflict and battle of the sexes, competition for power and for a man's place in the world. In an absolutely alien and unacceptable world for a woman!
Being a girl and looking at dad with loving eyes is good in childhood.
Staying a girl and looking with loving eyes in every man for his dad - in the adult world - is, to put it mildly, frivolous.
Why?
A woman refuses herself, she betrays her path and her significance, the ability to influence her destiny.
Although a woman can be sure of the opposite, that she was betrayed by "these bastards men" who stubbornly refuse to fulfill her rosy dream - to become her dad.
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