Women Who Endure The Brain

Table of contents:

Video: Women Who Endure The Brain

Video: Women Who Endure The Brain
Video: How do women endure the brain? | | Subscriber questions 2024, March
Women Who Endure The Brain
Women Who Endure The Brain
Anonim

The main negative trait of women, many men call the tendency to "carry the brain".

Often men who have been married and are no longer in a hurry to go there explain their unwillingness in this way: I don’t want my brain to be taken out

If a man does not fulfill the woman's expectation (he forgot to call, came home from work later, drank too much, did not congratulate him on the anniversary of his acquaintance, admired another woman, etc.), the woman makes a grandiose scandal, long and exhausting, insults and scolds him with the last words.

A man who begins with excuses and apologies soon ceases to feel guilty because his guilt does not match the barrage of abuse that is being poured on him. And in the case of repetitions of "misconduct" (which always happen), the man already experiences fear and even hatred of the woman in advance, expecting that she will again take out the brain. This makes family life unbearable, and most importantly, has the opposite effect: it encourages men to do more and more in their own way, without taking into account women's expectations.

Most often (according to statistics), couples break up at the initiative of women, but at first the man refuses to commit, in other words, he begins to "send the woman through the forest", not even fulfilling the agreements that he was ready to fulfill. This is what taking out the brain leads to.

And although many women argue that some men can handle the brain as well, and among women there are those who cannot bear the brain, in general the situation looks like this: women specialize in removing the brain to men.

I will name the cause of such a disaster, which will suggest how to significantly reduce its scale.

If you ask the women themselves how to make sure they can't stand their brains, women will say something like this: “You need to do what I ask, it's not so difficult.

In this formulation, two main bugs are immediately visible:

1. A woman is sure that it is not difficult for a man to fulfill her request, and it is difficult for a man.

2. A woman considers herself entitled to punish a man, but a man does not recognize such a right for her.

When a woman is calm and contented, she easily agrees that what seems simple to one can be difficult for another, and one adult cannot punish another, especially a woman to a man, but when her roof is torn from resentment and anger, all the correct settings fly off and she just takes out the brain.

atkritka_1415197161_486
atkritka_1415197161_486

Let's try to see why this is happening? What is this permanent failure?

Why is a woman sure that it should be easy for a man to call her when he is fishing or on a business trip, answer her SMS immediately, remember the date of acquaintance, and not stare at others? Why does the man's statement that this is all too difficult for him, so he does not always do it, cause a wave of hatred in her and a desire to wipe him off the face of the earth?

There is only one reason.

A woman lives with the illusion of her very high significance for a man, and every time his behavior shows her the opposite, she starts hysterical, from which logic and all moral attitudes are turned off. She turns into a mad creature that fiercely protects her world, or rather her illusions, without which she cannot live.

It is difficult for him to remember her = he has more important things to do than she.

The woman cannot agree with this fact.

Her real importance to him is much more modest than she thinks. She occupies a certain, even important, place in a man's life, and the more joy he gets from communicating with her, the more important this place is. But a man's life consists not only of her, in his system of priorities it is most often not in the first place, and sometimes not even in second. A woman cannot come to terms with the real state of affairs, she only agrees to the first place, or better - to the first three. But in this case, the man cannot forget and call her for a whole day, if he has not drowned, so when a man suddenly disappears, the woman rushes in fear between his possible death and the collapse of her illusions (which is even worse than his death), and when it turns out that he is alive and well, just drinking with friends carried him away, she perceives it as a spit not just in the soul, but in the most sacred place of her soul, literally on the altar. The altar is the significance of their relationship to him.

Brain-carrying women almost always have a deity. This is Love (his to her). When a man shows that he treats her without strong trepidation, even somewhat dismissively, he, no more - no less, tries to kill her deity, and the woman behaves obsessively like a fanatic protecting the shrine from abuse.

The desecrator has only one chance to regain trust: to admit the severity of his blasphemy, to express the shock of his low deed, to sincerely repent. A woman expects a man to say: "I don't know how I could have done this, you are the main thing for me, I have no forgiveness, and all your rude words are a trifle compared to how I could call myself!", and instead, he claims that he did nothing terrible, and therefore the woman's anger is even stronger.

It turns out that no, this is not a wild accident: he not only forgot about it, but also does not see anything wrong with it. Yes, he deserves the death penalty!

atkritka_1363092569_1
atkritka_1363092569_1

When a woman calms down, she most often restores her illusions (the brain is a virtuoso). No, the "trauma" remains, of course. That is, even having restored the illusion of her importance for a man, a woman with pain and horror remembers each of his "crimes", she says that there are wounds on her heart, but she tries to reopen them as little as possible. However, each new misdeed of a man revives the old pain. Therefore, her pain more and more overflows the banks. A man hopes that a woman will somehow get used to the fact that he sometimes forgets about her, but she cannot get used to it, because she never honestly accepts and does not admit it, every time she tries only to supplant and forget.

Why do many women never get used to the fact that for a man they are not the meaning of life, and love for her is not the main goal of his life, they cannot come to terms with this, it is easier for them to divorce, and be alone, waiting for the man for whom will they become a goddess, or not expecting anything? Where does the all-or-nothing position come from?

Why shouldn't a woman treat love the way a man does, highlighting love a certain place in life, but not turning it into a cult? In this case, it would be clear to her that a man can sometimes forget about her, because she would forget about him sometimes. But no, a woman who can endure a brain never forgets about a man, she always thinks about him, so she cannot forgive him in any way that he treats her differently. For her, this is a betrayal.

When men are looking for a way to end scandals and brainwashing, they often try to do the wrong thing. They try to fight, hoping that a woman will simply accept their right to freedom, but this does not work, because a woman literally stands to death. It's easier to kill her than to make her reconcile.

Men do not understand that the reason for this behavior of women is that women are too absorbed in relationships and cannot agree to play a secondary role in a man's life. There are two ways out:

1. Reduce female preoccupation

Men are not always ready for this. And they can be understood. Very often, a woman shifts part of her attention from a man not to work, sports and studies, but to other men. That is, a woman cannot reduce general absorption and obsession with love (!), But simply deprives this man of exclusivity. Of course, the man does not like this, he prefers that the entire love sphere of a woman would be occupied only by him, and this is a fair demand.

We often hear women complain that a man spends time with friends, but does not let her go to her friends in a bar. But communication in this case is really not very symmetrical. Conversations in a male company are not limited to "women", they occupy from 0 to 20% of conversations, depending on the company. But the topic of men in the conversations of girlfriends - from 60 to 100%, and in a different format. In addition, women traditionally go to a bar to get acquainted, while men do not always. That is, the gender difference does not yet allow such actions to be considered completely symmetrical, and this must be taken into account. The changes are not that quick.

The frenzy of women who take out the brain is due precisely to the fact that they cannot reduce their attention to love and do something else, love is the main sphere of their life, the main or only source of nutrition for self-esteem. They can only stop loving this man in order to look for another. Therefore, for any trifling reason, such a furious scandal arises: a woman makes it clear that the fate of their relationship is now being decided. For a man it seems like a trifle, but for her it can be the collapse of everything. And if a man does not return the woman's confidence in his love, she will look for another. A man is, of course, insulted by such hints. It is as if a demand is being made to him: either you will obey me, or I will fall in love with another, that is, he is denied importance.

But if a woman can find spheres to nourish her self-esteem that are not at all related to love (not also related to flirting, beauty, talking about men), she will be able to slightly reduce her preoccupation with relationships and immediately (!) Will begin to be more loyal to the fact that she is not the only goal in life for a man and yes, sometimes he can be busy with something else. So does she. But, in general, it is very important for him, and in some moments it takes his entire attention. It's just not always.

2. Increase male loyalty

Since it is often difficult to drastically reduce female preoccupation with relationships (although you need to try), and women still remain absorbed in this area more than men, an experienced and wise (that "real") man should take this difference into account.

A man needs to honestly estimate how much love takes more place in a woman's life than for him. Perhaps, if she was as passionate about career, politics, sports and cars as he was, she would not be quite a woman. And if a man values femininity in a woman, it is important for him to take into account the gap in the value series.

For example, he'd better come to terms with some of her taboos. Yes, not to call even once a day (if everything is fine with the connection) is a taboo. Forget about the wedding day - too. Do not warn that you are very late at work - from the same series. There are some things that a man is not able to feel the importance of (precisely because of the less preoccupation with relationships), but simply must accept. It is not necessary to understand.

If, despite the fact that the man takes into account the main taboos and does not violate, the woman is still engaged in removing the brain for any reason, then her preoccupation with relationships is too great. If she does not find herself any useful sphere of occupation other than love, she will continue to endure his brain, or she will look for a replacement for him among men. Therefore, it is important to think towards expanding her living space together. But precisely not in terms of idle entertainment, but something so useful, not related to love, which a woman could get carried away with and eventually feel an increase in self-esteem. Her self-esteem will grow, there will be no removal of the brain - this is a guarantor.

If a man does not succeed in observing the main female taboos, he literally turns back from the fact that he needs to call, report, talk about love, perhaps a bias - on the part of the man. It is possible that for a man, relationships have too little meaning (in general or with a given woman), he needs more freedom than is possible in marriage. In this case, it is almost useless to wait for the woman to stop enduring the brain without replacing it with another man. Most women feel better alone than around a man who loves them very little

Source: evo-lutio.livejournal.com

Recommended: