External Portrait Of Traumatic

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-08-08 14:21

How does a traumatic person behave and how to determine this type of personality from the outside? To answer these questions, you need to understand the concept of trauma

Trauma is a strong blow to the psyche, which a person receives quite regularly, as a result he cannot withstand psychological stress and, relatively speaking, "breaks down". That is, the internal and external resources of a person are stronger than the impact of environmental factors (for example, the influence of strangers and close people - a mother or father figure, native grandmothers, grandfathers, etc.)

The most severe traumas, which have a significant impact on the further formation of the personality psyche, occur in early childhood. It is believed that before the age of seven, psychological trauma leaves an indelible mark on the human psyche. These are mainly attachment injuries. For example, injuries related to safety and trust (form a basic defect in a person), injuries of fusion or separation, injuries of a narcissistic or schizoid nature

Accordingly, a person who is traumatized in the zone of safety, trust and confluence will have a schizoid personality type. Trauma associated with separation, lack of praise, recognition, and acceptance builds up a narcissistic character. Rejection on the part of parents and in society in general, the divorce of mom and dad will be the reason for the formation of a depressive personality. In the latter case, the attitude towards the child will become an additional factor of injury in the event of a lack of external resources (for example, during a family crisis, the child was supported by his grandmother - in this case, his psyche will not be injured). Getting a psychological trauma depends on the presence of a formed psyche, its stability and support (relatives, neighbors, etc.), that is, the same trauma has a different effect on different children. Depending on the strength of the trauma, the structure of the organization of the personality is formed (neurotic, borderline or psychotic type). Thus, the more the trauma destroys the psyche, the closer the person becomes to psychosis along the health continuum

What determines the strength of the injury? There are at least three factors - the strength of the impact, the frequency, the list of resources for the child

There may be injuries as adults. Basically, they are associated with violence or military actions, a strong shock in life, which radically changed a person's outlook on life (attack, robbery, etc.)

If in childhood the child was beaten, ignored or exerted psychological pressure on him, the type of organization of the personality will be traumatic in nature. Such individuals do not perceive attachment - they associate it with danger, since even the closest people can harm and bring pain

What are the external signs of trauma? First of all, fear, which underlies the traumatic nature. Outwardly, you can see not fear, but anger, guilt or shame. This is a defensive reaction of people. For example, the outward manifestation of a narcissistic character is a kind of playing with God, ostentatious superiority and a complete absence of shame

Guilt can be seen in situations where a person takes responsibility to justify the actions of others and the pain caused to him - it is easier to believe that someone hurt because of his own failure and mistakes in actions ("I did it wrong, therefore he himself is to blame and must answer for his actions! "). For what other reason do people take the blame? In order not to feel the insecurity of the world, to control possible pain and resentment. It is hard enough for any person to experience powerlessness. In psychology, this experience is considered the most difficult. In fact, people hide their helplessness behind feelings of guilt (“I will definitely do better next time and no one will hurt me”). Such personalities are most often in some kind of anxiety, fussiness or panic. You can often hear the following phrases from them - “I have no free time”, “I have no time to do anything”, “I don’t want to waste my time on these questions”, “What if the time will be wasted”. They are completely focused on the current time, as if the future is very limited or not at all

Traumatics have an amazing characteristic - either they need time to enter into a relationship, or they quickly enter into a relationship. However, after a while, a break occurs - traumatics cannot withstand stress and pressure. The external reaction is quite inadequate - excessive control, self-flagellation, sudden outbursts of anger, blame, isolation, devaluation, avoidance addict, love addiction, hysterical tears or scandals

The relationship with traumatic people is reminiscent of the simple phrase "Stop there, come here." On the one hand, a person makes multidirectional demands ("Work, earn money and more"). And on the other hand - "No, sit with me all the time." Behavior is believed to be based on a very strong need. The earlier the trauma occurs, the more difficult it is to identify your need for this world. It is difficult to satisfy this need for partnerships either. Regardless of the level of satisfaction of the traumatic, he levels and devalues everything, and accordingly everything passes by. Why? It turns out that a place should be formed in the soul, with the help of which a person is able to accept

Traumatics resemble hedgehogs. It is very difficult to communicate with them, they are caustic and can make trouble out of the blue, bite, rush and get angry. This behavior is directly related to the degree of trauma to a person. If the injuries were inflicted on a person in an earlier period, every centimeter of the body is a kind of open wound. Each touch is pain, trauma and a defensive reaction (flash). The traumatic's tentative response is anger or isolation

It may seem to an outsider that the traumatic's reaction is very sharp and excessive. An unexpected scandal, an outburst of anger, unfounded accusations ("A-ah, you annoy me!"). However, in reality, he just stepped on a painful wound, so the traumatic person went into the trauma funnel, and the behavior manifested is a state of passion

What feelings does a partner, close person with whom you communicate? There are two sides: one always wants to help, warm, support, and the second is characterized by a sense of guilt. And this wine is very strong, pathological and toxic. It is based on a misunderstanding of the line of behavior in relation to the traumatic. Somewhere deep inside, they have warmth, care and a desire to open up. And for this it is only enough to do something differently. Trauma sufferers do have feelings, but they are hidden deep in the mind, behind a thousand defense mechanisms that help protect painful areas

It is difficult for individuals with a traumatic disposition to show tenderness, warmth and care. For some, this is worse and more dangerous than showing aggression and anger. If a person throughout his life experienced anger, aggression, was isolated from everyone and rejected, his behavior is a copy of the attitude of others towards him

For a traumatic person, a warm situation is a new experience that causes panic. For an ordinary person, this is an experience that forms a feeling of fear and internal tension, but the traumatic person does not understand this warmth and tenderness at all, therefore, he turns on his “hedgehog” defense mechanism

Inside each traumatic personality is a small, frightened child. To show warmth, tenderness and care for him can always be an order of magnitude more difficult than showing aggression, as well as accepting. A rather unstable and dangerous situation