2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
There are many dogmas and attitudes in society, one of which is “you cannot envy”. Expressions - "white envy" and "black envy" differ little from each other. It's a shame to be jealous - another common belief. The list, if desired, can be continued.
Envy, this feeling and very good, necessary for organizing your life, for the socialization of a person in society, it is not the only one in this case, but one of the most important.
Envy a social feeling, it allows you to grow up, discover your true needs and find ways to fulfill your desires.
Envy gives you the opportunity to recognize and compete. Recognition is also a consequence of the ability to experience envy.
Envy helps to notice their limitations and somehow cope with them, it helps to regulate their needs, makes it possible to adapt. Creative adaptation can be seen as one of the results, the experience of envy.
I remember how I woke up only from the fact (on a chair in the garden) that I saw out of the corner of my eye - Lenka had a new dress … I was interested, but also enviable too. I told my mother - "I want a dress with such ruffles, buy it." To which my mother said - “With ruffles? I will sew you with ruffles from my old skirt, but I will not buy it, there is no money for such a purchase now."
Sometimes in the morning I woke up, and I had a new dress hanging on my chair, the one that my mother sewed for me. Beautiful, new, albeit from an old skirt. Today I sew and alter with pleasure - I do interesting things for myself, this is a lot of creativity and inspiration.
Envy not typical for a child under three years old - the development task is different, but after three … especially after five (I want to say) the child gets acquainted with this feeling and somehow "masters" it. Envy helps the child to face the reality of social life.
Finding jealousy helps you evolve. If a person cannot experience "envy", then he finds himself in a difficult situation for himself. After all, envy is a feeling and if it cannot be experienced it will need to be ignored and suppressed, thereby suffering from an unclear injustice.
Due to the impossibility of detecting and experiencing "envy", a lot of misfortunes and misunderstandings happen.
For some people, "envy" is a difficult feeling, an impossible feeling, and its place is taken by helplessness and greed. A person becomes a victim - of circumstances, fate … he becomes inseparable from the "desire of the majority" and his personal needs may disappear in the sea of "suppressed envy".
Unfortunately, for someone you can only remain helpless and deprived. But fortunately, for some, envy is an opportunity for competition, recognition and inspiration.
Well, I will add - envy is possible only where there is "one's own capabilities", one's own abilities. For example, as I explained to one male client what "envy" is, how it is revealed:
- You know, I say, but I can still give birth to a child, even though I am old enough for this case.
- So what…. he said, looking at me with a dull look
- Don't you envy me?
- No.
… over time
- You know, but I'll probably take myself a Chevrolet Tracker crossover car (I provoke, I know that he wants such a car)
The man's eyes "lit up" … excitement appeared..
- What is happening to you? I ask
- Never mind…
- It looks like you are not indifferent to this … this is how envy begins - with excitement and this is not indifference, that's for sure.
"Envy take what they don't give us" - proverb
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