2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Probably most of them had at least one-time dental problems. The most painful thing is not when a hole is drilled (although the sound and sensations are still the same). The hardest part is when the nerve is exposed. Then it's not that chewing 30 times for good digestion is difficult, chewing, in principle, becomes impossible. As well as drinking water, as well as taking a sharp breath, because from contact with a cold or just a sharp gust of air, the whole body is literally pierced by hellish pain. This is how traumatics feel
Being a traumatic person is not easy. It means being in constant expectation that someone will certainly hurt, offend, and enter your territory. This means, from the very waking up to the moment of the onset of sleep, to keep the defense. Often this tense state is broadcast even at night, because the fig knows what will come for the image in a dream. Therefore, for safety, let these vile dreams do not "dream" at all.
To be a traumatic person means not to hear and not to believe in the sincere and warm, but to absorb, like a sponge, everything that is sharp and offensive. Such people literally think that almost any phrase / intonation refers to them, and certainly in a negative, judgmental context. Therefore, they react so painfully, otherwise they cannot for certain reasons.
First, they lack the experience of total acceptance that comes from childhood. Everything they did was not as good as either parent wanted. The most important and voluminous feeling with which they grew up was "You are not what you need, uncomfortable. Change and then I will begin to love and appreciate you."
Second, when mercy and praise for the “right” behavior were replaced by anger and rejection for the “wrong” behavior, there was a fixation on the loss. That is, the mottos for life were "and this good will end", "be careful", "do not trust anyone, do not ask for anything."
With time and age, you can learn to control this constant anxiety outside, but it will always sit inside in a small dark lump, like a cat on an armchair in front of a fireplace in a cold, snowy winter. It will be almost impossible to endure uncertainty, so the initiative for parting will almost always be with them. Because why wait if "and this good will end sometime."
This is how walking in a circle is formed. Because the rejection of heat does not mean at all that it ceases to be needed. The thirst for recognition not only of one's goodness, but also of existence, in principle, does not disappear anywhere. She still remains a bare nerve, every touch of which responds with pain in the very heart.
And now this thirst for recognition, warmth and acceptance does not clothe itself in the mantle of visibility with a pattern of words, but spreads in fog along the valley of each day. And until it is thrown out loud, expressed, voiced - everything will remain in place. Because you cannot suddenly become full if you refuse to eat all the time.
Traumatics are small adult children who expect their mother to love them not only when they are obedient. But even then, when they will break her favorite perfume and cut out hearts for a garland from her father's shirt. It is important for them to know that their mother will not go crazy and will not collapse from their great anger and from loud crying. And so, fighting every day with the inner mills, they walk in circles and wait for someone to give them the desired permission: just to be. No conditions.
So that's it. Can. Do not go to boring meetings and get angry when you are offended. You can feel pain and behave "wrong". Allow yourself this at least in thoughts, if in reality it does not work out yet. And over time, you see, and master such a coveted skill
Take care of yourself)
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