2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
When we understand that the relationships that we have have already outlived theirs, we have to make a choice: end the relationship or stay in it. And if we decide to end the relationship, we may feel guilty towards our partner. After all, it is we who initiated what is happening. After all, it is because of us (our decision) that it can be very painful and bad for him.
One part of us longs for a different life, and the other part of us is very difficult to leave the old relationship. Naturally, in order to have enough strength to get out of these relations, you need to deal with your internal contradictions. To discover those painful parts with which we “hold on” to our partner and thus do not allow ourselves to follow our Happiness.
And as long as the fear of leaving an obsolete relationship is stronger, we will make a choice in favor of this relationship. But as soon as our inner parts are strengthened, we have the strength and confidence to make a different choice.
After informing your partner about your decision, you can see in his eyes the same pain that is so familiar to us, and this can make it even more painful.. Doubts may appear about the correctness of your choice. We can begin to blame and reproach ourselves - and by this we shift responsibility for the life and feelings of another person. As a result, we again find ourselves in the cycle of our doubts and internal contradictions.
And so that this pain does not drown out your true voice and does not become the leading one in the choice, it is very important to dot the points inside yourself:
- Recognize your own and his pain.
- Recognize your right to make choices towards greater happiness.
- To share your responsibility and the responsibility of another person in this relationship.
It might sound like this:
- It hurts - and it hurts..
- I feel sorry for myself - and I feel sorry for you..
- I see my pain in you and it makes me be close to you.
- I pity you, but pity is not love and I do not become happier from this next to you.
- I feel very bad in these relationships, I suffocate in them - and I want to live!
- Even if it makes you feel bad, I still choose my happiness and my life!
- I take my pain for myself - and I give you the experience of your pain.
“I don’t want to do you well at my own expense anymore. This is not fair to me.
- I have no right to treat my Soul, my desires, my aspirations badly - after all, I will not be able to reveal my potential, I will not be able to realize my life tasks..
- I want to choose a relationship based not on the painful attachment of my inner child - I want and choose a relationship that will delight and fill my Soul.. Relationships in which my female Soul will blossom (and not fade)..
- I have the right to be happy - and you have the right to be happy.
- You have the strength to cope - and I have the strength to choose my path."
Of course, letting go of any relationship is not an easy task that requires time, mental strength, and rethinking what is happening. It is impossible to let go of the past by just conscious efforts. Thus, it can only be pushed into the depths of oneself and closed with a bolt. But by closing the bar for one thing, we close the bar for everything else, and our life becomes dull and poorer..
Any of your choices is important to live / feel / get sick / let go of the unnecessary, leaving only the valuable pearls acquired along the way.
Only by fully living our life experience - our life is felt more intense and richer, it acquires more colors, wisdom and depth …
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