2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
There are many ways and types of manipulations, however, based on what our senses are played by the manipulator, they can be divided into six main types.
1. Manipulation of love
As a child, you were told: "If you play like that, I will not love you." Although they really meant: "Listen to me." The woman turns to her husband: "If you loved me, you would not stay so often after work," but in fact, "I want to control you."
2. Manipulation of fear
As a child, you were told: "If you don't do your homework, you will become a janitor." Although they really meant: "I don't know how else to get you to do your homework." The man says: "If I continue to work in this company, I will have a heart attack." Although, in fact, he means: "I do much more than you deserve, and I look forward to a reward for it."
3. Manipulation of self-doubt
Your man says to you: "Are you going to eat for the night? Well, come on, come on. I'll play the computer then." Although he really wants to say: "I will use your weakness to do something that you do not like and will not be guilty." The wife says to her husband: "If he were a normal man, he would have fixed the plumbing himself long ago." But in reality, "Remember your place - you are nobody."
4. Manipulation of feelings of guilt
As a child, you were told: "Again I got two in chemistry? Then you will wash the dishes." Although they really mean: "I'm too lazy to wash the dishes, but it's inconvenient to ask you about it." Your man says to you: "Drank coffee with a friend while I was sitting here alone hungry with the children?" Although what he really means is: "Today I got a bonus for any behavior that I want, and you dare not tell me anything."
5. Manipulation of pride
At work, they say to you: "We know that you are a promising employee. We believe in you, so we offer you an increase, albeit keeping your old salary." Although they really mean: "We decided to save a little on your vanity."
6. Manipulation of feelings of pity
A wife, for example, will complain to her husband about her terrible tyrant parents, who controlled her all her life, did not allow her to take a step without their supervision. This is the unconscious manipulation of the husband by the wife. The husband is imbued with sympathy for the difficult childhood of his chosen one, pity her and is ready to help in everything. The theme of an unhappy childhood brings spouses together emotionally. If they have a conflict, then they know who to blame for it - their parents.
It is very important to understand what the people around us really want. On the one hand, this clarifies the motives of the people with whom we communicate, and on the other hand, it allows us to effectively counteract them, defending our interests.
(c) Ekaterina Ignatova
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