Comfortable Child Syndrome In Adulthood

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Video: Comfortable Child Syndrome In Adulthood

Video: Comfortable Child Syndrome In Adulthood
Video: The Golden Child Syndrome 2024, March
Comfortable Child Syndrome In Adulthood
Comfortable Child Syndrome In Adulthood
Anonim

Quiet, calm, absolutely not problematic children - mother's joy. Such children do not bring unnecessary trouble, they are one hundred percent obedient and predictable, comfortable in every sense. Mom said to play means we play, we have to eat - we go without a murmur whatever we give, sleep on schedule and in general not a step from mom

Children tend to grow up, and they bring this "convenience" into adulthood, they do not know how to go through life differently, they were taught that way.

From practice: the most surprising thing is that such adults with the “comfortable child” syndrome have very scanty and gray childhood memories; one gets the impression that they were not children at all.

In adulthood, the “comfortable child” actively reaps the benefits of his convenience, while continuing to be comfortable for the people around him.

In the material world, which usually happens with comfortable things, we simply quickly get used to it and stop appreciating, and sometimes even noticing, their presence in our life.

The same situation takes place in human relations.

The “comfortable child” is, as it were, a priori doomed to play secondary roles in adult life. Inability to take initiative, problems with adaptation in a dynamic society, framework and functioning according to the rules of life clearly laid down in childhood, an underdeveloped body of desires, lack of specific goals, plays a cruel joke in adulthood. One of the options for the development of events may be loneliness.

Not taught to establish long-term contact, to adapt, to be active, to take their place “under the sun” in a social group, emotionally withdrawn children, and then adults, turn out to be socially lonely, hostages of their “peculiarities”.

Adults with “comfortable children” syndrome have been dependent on the parental family for a very long time, hence the problems of a personal nature, how to build their own family, if the family already exists “Mom, Dad, Me”. They simply have no need to separate, they have not been taught this.

From a certain moment, adult life implies the ability to make independent decisions, the ability to take responsibility, to be aware of the consequences and causes of their actions, “comfortable children” can never grow up to this moment internally.

It's good if you understand that something is wrong in life, that you want communication, you want high-quality life changes (although which ones are not yet clear), then a long conscious road of growing up begins, gaining new and vital experience that has not been received and not passed in childhood. And it's good if there is a person nearby who can guide, suggest, support, it is very unlikely that it will be a mother, she could but could not help to get this experience then, in childhood.

You can and should look for a helping hand; it is almost impossible to go this way alone. Finding such a person is already the first colossal step towards a new life.

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