I Want To Become A Mother! Or What Prevents A Woman From Getting Pregnant: About Fears, About Goals And Motivation

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Video: I Want To Become A Mother! Or What Prevents A Woman From Getting Pregnant: About Fears, About Goals And Motivation

Video: I Want To Become A Mother! Or What Prevents A Woman From Getting Pregnant: About Fears, About Goals And Motivation
Video: Stop Being An Emotional Fool - Motivational Video By Sandeep Maheshwari 2024, March
I Want To Become A Mother! Or What Prevents A Woman From Getting Pregnant: About Fears, About Goals And Motivation
I Want To Become A Mother! Or What Prevents A Woman From Getting Pregnant: About Fears, About Goals And Motivation
Anonim

More and more often, both in consultations and in life, I meet successful beautiful women who have everything and who are in no hurry to have children, and sometimes even a family.

And when the hands on the clock of their lives, like Cinderella's, strike midnight, and in real life they are approaching the threshold of 40 years, they seem to wake up and begin to realize that the time given to them by nature for motherhood begins to run out …

Unfortunately, not all girls on the way to motherhood have a quick and cloudless path. More often than not, even healthy couples need precious time.

In this article, we will figure out how to help yourself "not to waste time" if you are puzzled by this topic in advance, and you have it in stock, or how to "buy time" if you are in a similar situation described above.

So, before us is not an easy task, but very interesting - "not to lose or gain time"!

It is important to understand here that in the literal sense, of course, it is not easy to win time, but one by one you can cross out those points that can hinder or slow down the cherished pregnancy at the physiological and psychological level. In this article, we will focus on the latter.

1) The first thing we need is not just a bright creative goal, but an awareness of it

Exactly! It is not enough to have a goal, although this is already great, it is important to bring it to a higher level.

There is a 100% working formula for success:

"Thought - Word - Deed - Final"

Our goal at the beginning is at the level of Thought, in order to "advance" it further we need to turn it into a Word, which means "Say" out loud, "Write".

If there are prejudices and it is difficult to tell someone, then you can always tell yourself!

And if we also write down our goal on paper, then according to the Law of the materiality of thought, we will many times bring its embodiment in reality.

It is important that the goal is bright - that is, with the involvement of the maximum number of positive emotions. It means you need to see, hear, feel it; play, as a director, a film in your imagination. Without fail endowing our film with feelings!

In my practice, there was such a case:

The husband really wanted children, and the wife was afraid. It was difficult for her to imagine herself in the role of a young mother. Kinesthetic perception (at the level of feelings) helped. I invited her to feel the baby in her arms, shake him mentally, hug him, feel his warmth, tenderness, defenselessness, and it worked! She smiled and said that she felt somehow very warm inside. Now, years later, this wonderful woman is a mother of many children of charming children!

It is absolutely necessary that what we strive for be creative or that we "see", consider this very creativity in any of our dreams!

Moreover, in our particular case, we are at the highest peak of creation! We want to create life itself !!!

It is important to feel it, paint it inside yourself with all the colors.

2) What prevents me from achieving my goal? What is slowing down?

As a rule, this is a large number of conscious and unconscious fears, doubts, apprehensions, etc.

Most often, fears can be divided into three categories:

fears associated with oneself

fears associated with the child

fears associated with the relationship of oneself / family with the unborn child

In the First category "About myself" the following fears are often heard:

- to feel bad during pregnancy (toxicosis, sluggishness, etc.);

- get fat, lose the beautiful shape of the breast after breastfeeding, get stretch marks on the skin of the abdomen, etc.;

- fear of giving birth;

- the relationship with her husband will go wrong: there will be problems with an intimate life, will fall out of love, will change, etc.

We'll figure out!

About feeling bad, getting fat and similar states, I once wrote a voluminous report, which can be found here: ****

About the difficulties that may arise with the physical body, I would like to say this: pregnancy is not a disease! This is the natural wonderful state of a woman!

It is difficult to imagine in nature, in natural conditions, that a woman lies throughout her pregnancy … Or that the whole tribe is waiting for her weak and lagging …

On the contrary, there is a large amount of information about how women stopped their horse, spread the cloak and gave birth, then carefully wrapped the child in the same cloak and galloped on. At the same time, the surrounding people often did not even notice the act of childbirth.

For those who talk about the wonderful ecology of the past, about the good health of women, I will answer: "Tell the truth." But everything is in your hands!

No one has ever canceled worries about their own health! And for a pregnant girl, this concern is even more important, since there are two of those who need this very health.

There are wonderful activities for expectant mothers: yoga, Pilates, aqua aerobics, swimming, walking.

My experience as a mother of three children is this: I did yoga, swam in the sea, and for the third time I rode a bicycle, contrary to popular belief, until childbirth.

I don’t urge anyone to ride a bike - it’s very important to track your condition! It made me happy and it was much easier to ride than to walk.

I would also like to add about the beauty of the body: the body should always be filled with your energy of love and gratitude. And the tummy and chest, and other parts of the body recovering. They do a great job - they store energy for giving birth and feeding a baby!

Our business with you is to agree with them that famine and war are not expected - so that they are stocked within the normal range. Thank them from the bottom of my heart for the very opportunity to become matter, to bear and feed a baby! Your pure and light gratitude will certainly respond in every cell of your body and will return to you a hundredfold. They are your faithful helpers on the way to motherhood, so be grateful to them, grateful to the maximum!

Fear of childbirth is a serious and large topic that must be resolved or minimized by the time of childbirth.

Such fear usually lies in the depths of our unconscious experience (subconsciousness). When our individuality or a baby in past incarnations could die in the process of childbirth, or we could see such cases that left a deep mark and make themselves felt today. Such an experience will certainly need correction with a trusted specialist dealing with such issues.

If you have not found a specialist, but time is running out, then try to help yourself by imagining that you have read about this in a book, getting used to the role of the heroine. But now the book is finished, but in reality everything is different - it is safe, there are always those who can help. There is no threat to your life and to the life of the newborn. Such mental work can significantly help, despite the apparent simplicity.

Of course, the fear of childbirth can be "imposed" by public opinion, when a girl from childhood hears stories, sees in films, etc. "difficult" scenes of childbirth. Such a not entirely competent perception also needs transformation.

At the end of such work, it is important to reach the conscious state "I want to give birth!" quite difficult to get pregnant).

Childbirth is as individual as the women themselves. Their course and your feelings are completely different from how it happens in others. The threshold of sensitivity, the perception of pain is different for everyone, but it is also possible and necessary to work with these two indicators, bringing them to normal. For this, a competent psychologist will always have the tools.

We will try to look from the other side at the generic sensations - they are inherently completely different from the pain that you faced earlier - these sensations do not result from injuries, physical injuries and the like; they are not the finale of some unpleasant incident, but, on the contrary, are the good herald of a new life.

There is an opening both on your physical level and on your spiritual level. Let us remember that it has long been established that it is fear that blocks or slows down the dilatation of the cervix. Here I would like to recall the advice of an experienced midwife: "It is very important not to get away from pain, not to avoid it, but to go to a meeting, dive into it, plunge, because each contraction brings the moment of the birth of your miracle closer." At such a moment you are passing the most important exam in a woman's life, you are passing your initiation into a mother.

Try to remind yourself more often that it is not at all easy for the baby now and he really doesn’t want to understand that he is hurting his very own creation - his mother, he would really like to hear not screams of pain, but words of encouragement that he will succeed … It will turn out to walk your way safe and sound! He really, really needs your support right now!

Be sure to master the breathing techniques, perhaps they will be the tool that does not allow you to "give up" and give up. Always remember: the darkest time is right before dawn!

The fears associated with the relationship with the husband and other family members are primarily rooted in claims, exaggerated expectations, unconscious aggression and hatred.

Your holistic, conscious rejection of the pretensions that turn beauties into grumpy old women will brighten your relationship!

Waiting standards are generally a thankless thing … To wait for something from someone means to fall into a dependent position all the time. Not done - bad; did - you can always find fault and find what is wrong. While women play such games, happy life passes by …

What can I do to strengthen our relationship?

What can I do to make family relationships even more harmonious with the advent of a new family member?

The position of being responsible for your happiness on yourself will always help out and reliably!

The more harmonious your relationship with your beloved, the more conscious your mutual choice to have a child was, the less complexity of this nature will arise. Therefore, it is very important to take care of this topic in advance, and specifically, your desire to have a baby should not be imposed, not just consent … but the general mutual desire of a man and a woman who created a family!

If you are only at the stage of creating a family, always pay attention to whether your chosen one wants to have children and how much his words coincide with deeds.

What to do if it was an unplanned pregnancy and the couple spontaneously decided on parenting?

- include a Human with a capital letter! Take responsibility for the present, past and future. Don't blame anyone. Understand that accidents are not accidental, everything that you have you yourself attracted into your life. I am convinced that children "appear" only from Love, even if it echoed through the thickness of incarnations. Once upon a time, perhaps hundreds of incarnations ago, it was true love and it has come to life now.

In the second category of greater fears on the topic:

- I'm afraid that the child will be born unhealthy;

- the medical staff will make some mistake in childbirth and this will affect the child;

- the later I give birth, the worse the genes in the child and the like.

For the child's health, it is necessary to realize that the mother is the first to shape him, and any fear directed at his physical condition adds a gap to his health. (Thought is material, and fear is a thought very tinged with emotions, which tends to turn into matter even faster.)

Here we cannot be called good mothers, if we allow ourselves to weaken our own developing baby with our own hands.

How to deal with such fears spontaneously "attacking" us?

Work and labor !!!

Suddenly?:)

The more busy you are, preferably an interesting thing or one where you have no time to be distracted, the less time and opportunity you have to think about bad things. Keep busy! Believe me, this is the best and completely free way to help yourself with quality.

And, of course, we include our "I Believe!" And "I do my best!"

Do you still smoke or allow yourself a glass of wine? - Throw it immediately!

Eating stress in the evenings with buns and exercising a little? - And what about the kid? He needs a healthy mom, oxygen and vitamins!

As they say: "He called himself a pie - get into the oven!"

I do not call for fanaticism! But reasonable literacy about yourself and your health - YES!

And, of course, the transformation of the chronic fatigue syndrome by the methods of the Knowledge System of the ECOLOGY OF THOUGHT L. P. Troyan for himself and the forming baby in every day will greatly help him to be born healthy and you feel great.

Everything in life happens on time! No matter how many years the long-awaited motherhood comes - any age is beautiful with abundant health, or female wisdom; great if you manage to combine these two wonderful qualities in time! This is how you should treat your age, be sure to remind yourself that youth is not age, but a state! Moreover, very soon you will become a young mother!

About doctors and medical staff, the conversation is short: if you come to a hairdresser, dentist, doctor, choose him - we sit at the reception and believe in his professionalism, we mentally thank him for all the time he has invested in his studies and work!

Once you came to this maternity hospital, you did not stay at home to give birth; you have a doctor - please be grateful for the conditions that have been created for you: for the presence of a maternity hospital as such; because you are not yourself - there are trained people next to you, ready to help; there are medicines, technologies, medical devices designed to help in the most difficult moment … Someone (or rather thousands of people) took care of everything in advance, so that you would feel safe today.

In any profession, people make mistakes and doctors' mistakes are very expensive, but your conscious "believe" and "thank you" directed at the doctor will help him show himself from the best professional side!

In the third:

- I will not cope as a mother, I do not know "how", I will not succeed, etc.;

- I / husband / his brothers or sisters will not be able to love him, jealousy, conflicts will arise;

- there will be difficulties with finances in the family.

To be a good mom: you need to be a mom! Only in the process, polishing yourself and your skills, only with experience will you be able to become a great mom!

The state "I can't do it!" It is an illiterate attitude that affects the entire body. It is important to collect such a state to a point, exhale it, remove it from your information field and replace it with a literate one: “I believe that I will succeed if I work, like everyone else who works; it will work out normally and in moderation! I do my best for this!"

Not sure how?

If you have a desire, you will succeed easily! There are many excellent educational platforms, courses, sites: for example, the site of Dr. Komarovsky; parent-child courses and meetings for mothers, psychological support for pregnancy and childbirth.

It is important here to track whether you have a desire and readiness to change and bring it to measure on a conscious and unconscious level! And most importantly, the readiness to apply the knowledge gained in practice.

Your sober view of information will be a plus.

We took care of the absence of conflicts in the last paragraph, transforming the state of unconscious aggression and hatred between family members. We can also cope with Jealousy by transforming the root causes of overlove-overdependence with each other, taking the position "no one owes us anything and does not owe us anything," restoring trusting relationships.

For most, finance is a hot topic. Here we can start preparing a certain "motherhood fund" in advance and will be actively involved in the process - after all, we now have a clear goal and time. We can actively believe in our chosen one and support him on the way to material stability.

The main thing to remember is a simple, but true folk wisdom: "If God gives a child, God gives to a child!"

Now there are many opportunities to work remotely from home via the Internet and a small child will not be a hindrance.

The crumb is growing rapidly, so there is no need to invest a fortune in the baby's wardrobe. And we can honestly say to relatives and friends that diapers are the best gift!:)

A smiling and sleeping mother is a guarantee of peace and health for the child, as well as for the whole family!

Speaking to myself, I worked with the first two babies until the 8th month of pregnancy and went to work from the second month; and with the third I worked until the very birth and the first job was already on the 10th day of my daughter's life.

I will answer all questions like this - I just really love my job! And the opportunity to work on Skype and a loving husband, ready to be with the baby, allows this to come true!

3) And the last thing I want to say is about motivation

Why do I want to be a mom? For whom?

And here you just need to sit in silence for the required amount of time and ponder the answers to these fundamental questions.

WHY is this all? For the sake of what and for whom?

Find your own meaningful, personally motivating answers.

To see, hear and feel how the whole planet will overflow with happiness from the birth of another Human!

How the whole world is waiting for his name!

That this is still a small "stone in a pond", from which circles will go all over the Universe.

As all Teachers and Patrons gathered around ready to help, support you and him in this great goal.

That at this moment, at the moment of decision, you are similar to God the Creator - you are creating a new creation!

What are you "FOR" LIFE! And you prove it not just by word, but also by deed, giving birth to life!

That you are a real Woman, ready to go through your initiation, dedication, completing your great, most important mission on planet Earth!

Once your parents decided to "call" you into this world, and before that your grandparents, and before that your great-grandmothers and daddies, now it's your turn to carry LIFE.

At the moment of birth, not only a new little inhabitant of the planet will be born, a new you will be born …

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