Sex And Relationships With Hysterical (histrionic) Personalities

Video: Sex And Relationships With Hysterical (histrionic) Personalities

Video: Sex And Relationships With Hysterical (histrionic) Personalities
Video: Histrionic Personality Disorder Deep Dive | What is Hysteria? 2024, April
Sex And Relationships With Hysterical (histrionic) Personalities
Sex And Relationships With Hysterical (histrionic) Personalities
Anonim

What many people know today about the hysterical character is largely based on myths and prejudices.

The scandalously thrown word "hysterical" includes such characteristics as scandalousness, psychopathy, tearfulness, quickly replaced by joy, sexual unbridledness (to the myth of the womb wandering through the body - from ancient Greek ὑστέρα - "womb"), pretend behavior, gender coloring (hysterical is exclusively a woman).

Modern scientific psychology has already moved away from the term "hysterical", indicating gender. Instead, the term "histrionic" (from the Latin histrio - "actor") is now used, reflecting the theatrical essence of these personalities. I will use it.

I also note that a character is described that does not go beyond accentuation, when characterological "accents" are clearly manifested only in certain circumstances, and not constantly, as in a personality disorder.

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There is an opinion that since a person is called theatrical, it means that she cannot be trusted, all her emotions are played out, insincere, that she is deceitful, inconsistent and constantly in a state of exaltation. Perhaps this is seen from the outside, when a person is unfamiliar with the etiopathogenesis of a histrionic nature.

Most often, a child copies a pattern of demonstrativeness from one of the parents, or it is formed under certain conditions. For example, at a consultation, you can hear from a histrionic hypochondriac, how in childhood parents only swore among themselves, but they did not pay attention to him, then the only salvation was to get sick. The disease resolved for a while the conflict between the parents and the child received attention and care.

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When a child develops a pattern of going into illness, he turns out to be an unhappy adult, full of anxiety and phobias, constantly running to the doctors. Moreover, he does not run on purpose, because he is a liar and a simulator - he really feels bad, he is being treated, but nothing helps. This happens because a person has no connection with his unconscious, he cannot understand, track what kind of internal conflict, what repressed experiences and needs are converted into a bodily symptom. He simply does not hear his needs, and therefore cannot satisfy them. In this case, medicine is a poultice for him for a while, like a mustard plaster - it does not heal, but soothes.

There are photos showing a hysterical arc or seizures similar to epileptic seizures, which are the result of suppressed libido and other intrapersonal conflicts, like VSD, respiratory system diseases, migraines and much more.

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Histrionic hypochondriacs can also have masochistic inclinations, a mixture of depressive-paranoid traits (tearfulness, sacrifice, vulnerability, resentment).

Theatrical character (the need to draw attention to oneself in one way or another) can also take shape in a family where the child is an idol. When the theatricality of children is not suppressed by ill-treatment, they are very noisy, cheerful, they like to grimace, fool around, perform in front of everyone with poetry, sing songs, are the ringleaders in the team. This type can be classified as histrionic-hyperthymic.

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The histrionic personality really likes to exaggerate their achievements, abilities, or even come up with a story from start to finish. The need for embellishment, the tendency to wander in the clouds of one's dreams, is a form of dissociative defense. When the circumstances are not entirely satisfactory, the histrionic prefers to replace the frustrating reality with another. Moreover, he will sincerely believe in his invention. That is why these individuals manage to deceive even the lie detector.

Histrionics can also be inconsistent due to their emotionally labile nature. Until recently, he was crying bitterly and was on the verge of suicide (and he really was very bitter), but a little time passed - and the sun came out again.

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A histrionic person is unable to be angry for a long time and be in a quarrel. Today it may be darker than a cloud, but tomorrow it can gather everyone for a holiday.

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A histrionic person is very active, aimed at achieving success, makes decisions quickly, proactively, but organization and planning is his weak point. He can start with half a turn and burn out just as quickly, so his desires and plans often change. Also, the histrionic personality does not tolerate strict frameworks in work and control. Can only work under close supervision, when the leader praises and directs gently.

The histrionic personality will never be content with a second role in a relationship. This is her narcissism - to be better, if not here, then in another place. Associated with this is the rapid depreciation of the relationship if the histrionist realizes that the well for his narcissistic feeding has dried up.

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Life with a histrionic personality is interesting if a partner gets used to outbursts of transient anger, not taking it personally, and from time to time praises, says compliments, patiently treats fluctuations in the sexual sphere, does not press and does not show despotism.

One client proudly informed me that her husband's phone book listed her as "My Goddess."

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The topic of sex is a separate topic in the life of histrionics. At the candy-bouquet stage, they, like peacocks in all their glory, spread their "tail", try to charm, charm the partner, during sex correspond to all his ideas and wishes. Indeed, the stranger is often idealized, endowed with the qualities of a strong, omnipotent male.

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However, over time, when the veils of omnipotence subside and the histrionic realizes that this person, like everything else, farts and he is not so almighty, de-idealization occurs and the attraction is dulled. The man is elevated to the rank of father. Although, if a man could become a friend for a histrionic woman - not to press, but to prove himself a sensitive interlocutor - this could restore his male authority in her eyes and return the extinct libido.

The relationship of a histrionic woman with men always goes through idealization and devaluation. For the most part, they are in love with some imaginary ideal image.

The histrionic man also spends his whole life in search of his idealized Columbine.

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Freud saw the problem of the libido of histrionic women in their relationship with their father, and in boys with their mother.

In a girl's family, the role of a woman has always been devalued, and the role of a man has been idealized. When a girl was born, her mother always lamented: "And I was expecting a boy …", as if the boy could become the guarantee of her happiness. And therefore, a histrionic woman does not grow up without envy of men and their capabilities, which leads in her further relationships to idealization, and then to disappointment if the man turned out to be not so strong and successful. A despot man is perceived as psychologically castrating, therefore, in a family union, a woman's libido, if mistreated by a man, comes to naught.

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In the family of the histrionic boy, on the contrary, the role of the father was devalued, the relationship between the mother and the son was incestuous, or the mother was suppressive, who psychologically castrated her son, shamelessly interfering in his personal life, controlling, devaluing.

Don Juanism of a histrionic man comes from the idea of asserting himself over a woman - to seduce and devalue. He is constantly in battle with his imaginary mother and in search of the Beautiful Lady.

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In marriage, such men are often unfaithful, or feed on falling in love with some idealized image at a distance.

Histrionic women in marriage behave aloof (apart from periodic scandals related either to the psychological pressure of the husband, lack of support, or their own jealousy), are absorbed in work, hobbies, children, their thoughts, which is why a man may not get attention and warmth. In sex, they are not so much cold as dissociated, in parallel living some other reality.

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Outward gaiety, superficiality is often a mask. The rich inner world of histrionic personalities, woven from many shades of emotions, interests and fantasies, is in need of a reliable friend, a confidential interlocutor who could reveal mature sexuality in them.

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