2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
QUESTION 13. How to forgive yourself? The feeling of guilt in front of others and especially children is unbearable.
ANSWER: All forgiveness rituals are manipulations. Guilt is a toxic, poisonous feeling, very strong and deep. You have to work with guilt, not get rid of it. It is important to make it visible, to recognize its influence on oneself, relationships and spheres of life, to realize what behavioral strategies the wine launches, what triggers keep it in a person. In the future, wine is transformed into tranquility. After that, the attitude towards oneself changes. Alone, this path is difficult and very long.
QUESTION 14. How to let go of the person you love?
ANSWER: Get out of emotional codependency, work out your hyper control, authority, violation of other people's boundaries, change your personality through personal therapy and constellations, and grow up emotionally. To be in a male-female relationship, and not a mother - son….
QUESTION 15. How to understand your desires. Do I want to or not? Constantly the same thing: here the desire appeared and after an hour or two the desire is gone. I mean large, global desires. Why such a swing? Why don't my desires have the power?
ANSWER: First you need to understand yourself, who you are and what about? Then bring your inner world to some kind of stability while it is in chaos, hence the swing. Then release energy from the inhibitions of wanting something. This is how the forces for global desires will appear.
QUESTION 16. How to become more resistant to other people's thoughts, opinions, more precisely to their influence on my decisions and thoughts?
ANSWER: Shift the focus of attention to your life and your goals, first small, then more, to become interested in your destiny. Work with your self-esteem and self-confidence. While someone else's opinion is more important to you than your own, that's why such an influence.
QUESTION 17. Why are there difficulties in making decisions?
ANSWER: Because there is not enough internal independence and maturity, there is not enough energy, a lot of fears that are repressed. Part of the personality "inner child" sits and waits for the mother to come and decide everything for him. There may also be a ban on their decisions.
QUESTION 18. How can I understand where my guilt is? In my opinion, it is everywhere.
ANSWER: If you did something that is not good, vile, vile, criminal and you feel guilty, then it is yours. If everything is ok, but you feel guilty, it is not yours, it is taken over, that is, "coming" from the family system.
QUESTION 19. It is true that when you open yourself as is, without shame and fear. Do you get support and an honest answer in return?
ANSWER: Yes, that may be so. It may not be. J After all, the other person always has the right to lie to you or refuse support. You need to pump a skill - it is to withstand.
QUESTION 20. What reflects the state of being ashamed of another person
ANSWER: That you are included in a certain family history, in a certain family secret (about which you do not know anything), which "breaks through" through shame. It can also be the influence of parental attitudes, which you yourself are unknowingly faithful to.
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